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If IPL was nationalized
by doofus_maximus Fri Apr 29, 2011 8:18 am
from an email forward
1. The new Commissioner of the IPL, replacing Lalit Modi, will be an
IAS officer, 1989 batch, transferred from the Food Corporation of
India .
2. Mayawati will demand, however, that the new Chairman should be her
own candidate, Mr Dalit Modi.
3. The name of Mumbai Indians will immediately be changed to Mumbai
Manus. It will, naturally, field only Maharashtrians (preferably
Maharshtrian Brahmins). All other players will have their legs broken.
4. The Chennai Super Kings team will renamed Dravida Cricket Kazhagam.
Subsequently one faction will break away and the team will split into
DCK and AIADCK, owing allegience to Karunanidhi and Jayalalitha
respectively.
5. Each political party will have its own team: BJP Bandits, Congress
Cobras, CPI Cadres, Samajwadi Strikers, CPM Challengers, Trinamul
Tigers etc.
6. Auction of players will be replaced by teams calling for tenders
for players. The lowest priced players will be picked.
7. Mayawati will demand that SC/ST players will need to run for only
18 yards instead of 22 yards between the wickets.
8. Third Umpire requests will have to be filled in triplicate and duly
notarized.
9. Cheerleaders will be replaced by retired Air-India air hostesses
who will perform the folk dances of the states they represent during
breaks.
10. IPL matches will be shown only on Doordarshan. They will be
telecast the day immediately following the match, from 4 a.m. to 7.30
a.m. and subsequently from 3.30 a.m. to 7p.m, subject to satellite
link-up availability.
11. Between each innings break Doordarshan will telecast the news in
Hindi, followed by news for the hearing impaired.
12. Pakistan will immediately announce its intention to start its own
version of the tournament called PPL and Mr Zardari will make a visit
to Washington to meet President Obama and seek an additional grant of
$1 billion to fund it
1. The new Commissioner of the IPL, replacing Lalit Modi, will be an
IAS officer, 1989 batch, transferred from the Food Corporation of
India .
2. Mayawati will demand, however, that the new Chairman should be her
own candidate, Mr Dalit Modi.
3. The name of Mumbai Indians will immediately be changed to Mumbai
Manus. It will, naturally, field only Maharashtrians (preferably
Maharshtrian Brahmins). All other players will have their legs broken.
4. The Chennai Super Kings team will renamed Dravida Cricket Kazhagam.
Subsequently one faction will break away and the team will split into
DCK and AIADCK, owing allegience to Karunanidhi and Jayalalitha
respectively.
5. Each political party will have its own team: BJP Bandits, Congress
Cobras, CPI Cadres, Samajwadi Strikers, CPM Challengers, Trinamul
Tigers etc.
6. Auction of players will be replaced by teams calling for tenders
for players. The lowest priced players will be picked.
7. Mayawati will demand that SC/ST players will need to run for only
18 yards instead of 22 yards between the wickets.
8. Third Umpire requests will have to be filled in triplicate and duly
notarized.
9. Cheerleaders will be replaced by retired Air-India air hostesses
who will perform the folk dances of the states they represent during
breaks.
10. IPL matches will be shown only on Doordarshan. They will be
telecast the day immediately following the match, from 4 a.m. to 7.30
a.m. and subsequently from 3.30 a.m. to 7p.m, subject to satellite
link-up availability.
11. Between each innings break Doordarshan will telecast the news in
Hindi, followed by news for the hearing impaired.
12. Pakistan will immediately announce its intention to start its own
version of the tournament called PPL and Mr Zardari will make a visit
to Washington to meet President Obama and seek an additional grant of
$1 billion to fund it
doofus_maximus- Posts : 1903
Join date : 2011-04-29
Re: If IPL was nationalized
by charvaka Fri Apr 29, 2011 4:36 pm
Most importantly, it will be the Indian Premier League for Kabaddi, the national game.
doofus_maximus wrote:from an email forward
1. The new Commissioner of the IPL, replacing Lalit Modi, will be an
IAS officer, 1989 batch, transferred from the Food Corporation of
India .
2. Mayawati will demand, however, that the new Chairman should be her
own candidate, Mr Dalit Modi.
3. The name of Mumbai Indians will immediately be changed to Mumbai
Manus. It will, naturally, field only Maharashtrians (preferably
Maharshtrian Brahmins). All other players will have their legs broken.
4. The Chennai Super Kings team will renamed Dravida Cricket Kazhagam.
Subsequently one faction will break away and the team will split into
DCK and AIADCK, owing allegience to Karunanidhi and Jayalalitha
respectively.
5. Each political party will have its own team: BJP Bandits, Congress
Cobras, CPI Cadres, Samajwadi Strikers, CPM Challengers, Trinamul
Tigers etc.
6. Auction of players will be replaced by teams calling for tenders
for players. The lowest priced players will be picked.
7. Mayawati will demand that SC/ST players will need to run for only
18 yards instead of 22 yards between the wickets.
8. Third Umpire requests will have to be filled in triplicate and duly
notarized.
9. Cheerleaders will be replaced by retired Air-India air hostesses
who will perform the folk dances of the states they represent during
breaks.
10. IPL matches will be shown only on Doordarshan. They will be
telecast the day immediately following the match, from 4 a.m. to 7.30
a.m. and subsequently from 3.30 a.m. to 7p.m, subject to satellite
link-up availability.
11. Between each innings break Doordarshan will telecast the news in
Hindi, followed by news for the hearing impaired.
12. Pakistan will immediately announce its intention to start its own
version of the tournament called PPL and Mr Zardari will make a visit
to Washington to meet President Obama and seek an additional grant of
$1 billion to fund it
charvaka- Posts : 4347
Join date : 2011-04-28
Location : Berkeley, CA
Re: If IPL was nationalized
by Jatayu Sun May 01, 2011 2:24 pm
Allright!! I am here in the cricket section! took me a while but made it.
Jatayu- Posts : 1
Join date : 2011-05-01
Re: If IPL was nationalized
by charvaka Sun May 01, 2011 2:30 pm
Welcome!Jatayu wrote:Allright!! I am here in the cricket section! took me a while but made it.
charvaka- Posts : 4347
Join date : 2011-04-28
Location : Berkeley, CA
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