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Post by sulu on Wed Mar 27, 2019 3:54 pm

was coaching son the other day, on friendships, etc. and how to stay away from this one attention seeking dramebaaz who keeps creating serious (keyword - serious) problems for son. For the Nth time, he asked me, 'why should i end the complete friendship?' He hates being the insensitive guy, is the forever diplomat. I said, 'coz that kid is complicated, and you should not want such people in your life, it's not worth the time'. He goes, 'the whole thing with papa is also complicated, you still live with him'. And I was like, wow where's that coming from. For a quick reply i said, 'are you raising two kids together? have you been friends for decades?'. So he laughed a bit. but he handled ending that one pretty well, atleast so far it seems so. Luckily XH was on the same page to the last word on this one, and so was older sis, and his best friend (and his mom) as well. So collectively, he saw sense in hard-stopping that one.
but back to his comment, idk, am i indirectly teaching my kids to stay stuck in bad alliances, or has he just taken after me in temperament, or am i just thinking too much?

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Post by Kris on Wed Mar 27, 2019 8:57 pm

You are thinking too much.,No need for guilt. Your point about raising two kids etc is valid..He is just using skills fon debate class Smile

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Post by sulu on Thu Mar 28, 2019 2:59 pm

Kris wrote:You are thinking too much.,No need for guilt. Your point about raising two kids etc is valid..He is just using skills fon debate class Smile

guess i am overthinking. ... talking of debate skills and being sassy (sometimes the two are related) all my younger life back in desh, i had this fairly realistic acknowledgement that thank god i am a girl and not a boy, coz if i was a boy, i would so get beaten up on the streets, thanks to my smart mouth. It's only when i got much older did life serve me the humble pie.

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Post by Kris on Thu Mar 28, 2019 4:21 pm

What do you mean if you were a boy? No one ever tried to run me off the road...Smile

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Post by sulu on Fri Mar 29, 2019 6:18 am

Kris wrote:What do you mean if you were a boy? No one ever tried to run me off the road...Smile

Laughing Laughing imagine what all I would have attracted if I was a boy! But since you reminded me of it (again), guess that was the first time I was hated on in a love triangle situation, especially funny coz I wasn’t even involved with their guy(s) at the time!

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Post by Seva Lamberdar on Fri Mar 29, 2019 8:32 am

sulu wrote:was coaching son the other day, on friendships, etc. and how to stay away from this one attention seeking dramebaaz who keeps creating serious (keyword - serious) problems for son. For the Nth time, he asked me, 'why should i end the complete friendship?' He hates being the insensitive guy, is the forever diplomat. I said, 'coz that kid is complicated, and you should not want such people in your life, it's not worth the time'. He goes, 'the whole thing with papa is also complicated, you still live with him'. And I was like, wow where's that coming from. For a quick reply i said, 'are you raising two kids together? have you been friends for decades?'. So he laughed a bit. but he handled ending that one pretty well, atleast so far it seems so. Luckily XH was on the same page to the last word on this one, and so was older sis, and his best friend (and his mom) as well. So collectively, he saw sense in hard-stopping that one.
but back to his comment, idk, am i indirectly teaching my kids to stay stuck in bad alliances, or has he just taken after me in temperament, or am i just thinking too much?
Your son does have a point -- your 'XH' hanging around your house practically all the time with your permission.
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Post by sulu on Fri Mar 29, 2019 5:21 pm

Seva Lamberdar wrote:
sulu wrote:was coaching son the other day, on friendships, etc. and how to stay away from this one attention seeking dramebaaz who keeps creating serious (keyword - serious) problems for son. For the Nth time, he asked me, 'why should i end the complete friendship?' He hates being the insensitive guy, is the forever diplomat. I said, 'coz that kid is complicated, and you should not want such people in your life, it's not worth the time'. He goes, 'the whole thing with papa is also complicated, you still live with him'. And I was like, wow where's that coming from. For a quick reply i said, 'are you raising two kids together? have you been friends for decades?'. So he laughed a bit. but he handled ending that one pretty well, atleast so far it seems so. Luckily XH was on the same page to the last word on this one, and so was older sis, and his best friend (and his mom) as well. So collectively, he saw sense in hard-stopping that one.
but back to his comment, idk, am i indirectly teaching my kids to stay stuck in bad alliances, or has he just taken after me in temperament, or am i just thinking too much?
Your son does have a point -- your 'XH' hanging around your house practically all the time with your permission.

technically, he lives here, not hanging around Sad don't know why i needed to correct that though. Neither one of us has anyone who we may want to live with, and like my friend commented a long time ago, i guess neither one of us is capable of living alone; plus he's not a problem to live with at all. hence the current arrangement. not sure what kinda catalyst will cause this to change, but that's how it is for now.

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