My Tamil Friend

by Guest Wed Mar 16, 2016 6:52 pm

In my apartment complex there lives a tamil man who is an IT professional. He informs me that his former wife is a celebrity TV anchor in Tamil Nadu. He was married to her for four years and they have a daughter together. Some unfortunate differences developed between them and she left him. But i was sad to see that he still pines for her, misses her, loves her. No girl is as beautiful to him as his former wife is to him he tells me.

They have been divorced for three years now, and he continues to be single. She hasn't remarried either. The saddest part i thought was when he said that his daughter does not call him Daddy or Papa, and seems to have no affection for him. The ex-wife has sole custody of the girl who has been totally brainwashed he tells me. He goes regularly to the FB page of his father-in-law to download the latest pictures of his daughter. I saw pictures of his wedding and if you compare those to what he looks now it is clear that he has aged tremendously. Divorce with a child has got to be one of the most painful experiences any human can go through, particularly if you continue to love the person you are divorcing and that love is not reciprocated.

by seven Wed Mar 16, 2016 7:55 pm

Clearly he doesn't have enough friends. Not the good ones at least. It should t take this long to recover.

I cannot decide what's more sad, his wife left him or that you're his friend.

by Guest Wed Mar 16, 2016 8:48 pm

seven wrote:Clearly he doesn't have enough friends. Not the good ones at least. It should t take this long to recover.

don't forget that even she continues to be single. could it be that they will reconcile in future? He says they were happily married for four years and only four days of madness resulted in them splitting.

seven wrote:I cannot decide what's more sad, his wife left him or that you're his friend.

He's a friend, not a close friend.

by seven Wed Mar 16, 2016 9:12 pm

Barmy Fotheringay-Phipps wrote:
seven wrote:Clearly he doesn't have enough friends. Not the good ones at least. It should t take this long to recover.

don't forget that even she continues to be single. could it be that they will reconcile in future? He says they were happily married for four years and only four days of madness resulted in them splitting.

seven wrote:I cannot decide what's more sad, his wife left him or that you're his friend.

He's a friend, not a close friend.

The differences developed n resulted in a divorce. They didn't get a chance to reconcile in the time that it takes to finalize divorce. The momentum must have been too strong. The kid is brainwashed. No contact with dad. But she could still be in love with him.
Please leave story telling to pros. Don't try to play Tracy.

by Guest Wed Mar 16, 2016 9:18 pm

seven wrote:
Barmy Fotheringay-Phipps wrote:
seven wrote:Clearly he doesn't have enough friends. Not the good ones at least. It should t take this long to recover.

don't forget that even she continues to be single. could it be that they will reconcile in future? He says they were happily married for four years and only four days of madness resulted in them splitting.

seven wrote:I cannot decide what's more sad, his wife left him or that you're his friend.

He's a friend, not a close friend.
The differences developed n resulted in a divorce. They didn't get a chance to reconcile in the time that it takes to finalize divorce. The momentum must have been too strong. The kid is brainwashed. No contact with dad. But she could still be in love with him.
Please leave story telling to pros. Don't try to play Tracy.

it is true that there was a lot of bitterness and significant residual bitterness remains in her but don't forget that Time is a great healer. The anger and pain could go away with the passage of time. Even if they don't come together romantically i think there is a good chance that they may become good friends as they grow older.

by garam_kuta Wed Mar 16, 2016 9:39 pm

seven wrote:
Barmy Fotheringay-Phipps wrote:
seven wrote:Clearly he doesn't have enough friends. Not the good ones at least. It should t take this long to recover.

don't forget that even she continues to be single. could it be that they will reconcile in future? He says they were happily married for four years and only four days of madness resulted in them splitting.

seven wrote:I cannot decide what's more sad, his wife left him or that you're his friend.

He's a friend, not a close friend.
The differences developed n resulted in a divorce. They didn't get a chance to reconcile in the time that it takes to finalize divorce. The momentum must have been too strong. The kid is brainwashed. No contact with dad. But she could still be in love with him.
Please leave story telling to pros. Don't try to play Tracy.

hahaha

interesting..i got the same feeling that you're being lead down the garden path. anyways, your last line is as good as the master short story teller John O'Hara's..
I say this because of the recent TracyWhitney handle that got changed to garam_kutai. which is going to change to..hmmm

by Guest Thu Mar 17, 2016 8:58 am

My friend tells me that if his ex would accept him back he would happily return even if she were to say that she would no longer have sex with him. All because he wants to spend more time with his daughter.

He has met single mothers on matrimonial sites who he says fleeced him. One girl in Bombay asked him for money to pay for her child's medical expenses and he obliged even though he had never met her in person. Because he thought by helping this woman's child he is in some way compensating for the fact that he is unable to do more for his own daughter. A similar experience happened with someone in Seattle. Both times the girls stopped talking to him after taking his money.

by seven Thu Mar 17, 2016 9:12 am

Troll.

PS: I'm sorry they took your money n stopped talking to you.

PS2: stop n learn n try again @ your trolling effort.

by Guest Thu Mar 17, 2016 10:47 am

seven wrote:Troll.

PS: I'm sorry they took your money n stopped talking to you.

PS2: stop n learn n try again @ your trolling effort.

only once did a girl ask me for money. That was maybe seven years ago. I had met her only twice or thrice after which she asked me for a loan. I never spoke to her again.

But i did get fleeced myself a long time ago. In Bangalore, walking down the streets, and this man and woman with a small baby approach me and say they are on their way to Tirupati and they are coming from somewhere in Maharashtra. The first words they used on me were 'Aapko Hindi aati hai?' (Do you know hindi?). They said they had missed their bus which had their luggage and now they needed some money since they were stranded. I was unsure whether this was a scam or not and thought about it. Then gave them a hundred rupee note. I remember the woman was asking for more, but i said that's all i have.

A few days later, while walking near the same road i came across a different couple with another small child who initiated the conversation with the words 'Aapko Hindi aati hai?'. I replied 'Nahi aati hai' (No i don't know it) and continued walking in some disgust both at them and at myself for what happened the first time.

This happened on at least one and maybe two other occasions to me--always in the some locality of Bangalore near where i was residing at the time (Indranagar).

I spoke to a friend in Bangalore about my experience and he said it looks like its a gang. He said a couple with a child had approached him with a similar story line, but he had only given them ten rupees.

by seven Thu Mar 17, 2016 10:53 am

Barmy Fotheringay-Phipps wrote:
seven wrote:Troll.

PS: I'm sorry they took your money n stopped talking to you.

PS2: stop n learn n try again @ your trolling effort.

only once did a girl ask me for money. That was maybe seven years ago. I had met her only twice or thrice after which she asked me for a loan. I never spoke to her again.

But i did get fleeced myself a long time ago. In Bangalore, walking down the streets, and this man and woman with a small baby approach me and say they are on their way to Tirupati and they are coming from somewhere in Maharashtra. The first words they used on me were 'Aapko Hindi aati hai?' (Do you know hindi?). They said they had missed their bus which had their luggage and now they needed some money since they were stranded. I was unsure whether this was a scam or not and thought about it. Then gave them a hundred rupee note. I remember the woman was asking for more, but i said that's all i have.

A few days later, while walking near the same road i came across a different couple with another small child who initiated the conversation with the words 'Aapko Hindi aati hai?'. I replied 'Nahi aati hai' (No i don't know it) and continued walking in some disgust both at them and at myself for what happened the first time.

This happened on at least one and maybe two other occasions to me--always in the some locality of Bangalore near where i was residing at the time (Indranagar).

I spoke to a friend in Bangalore about my experience and he said it looks like its a gang. He said a couple with a child had approached him with a similar story line, but he had only given them ten rupees.

So you understand people will not give you any money if your story is not good.

*this is me, walking away*

by Guest Thu Mar 17, 2016 11:14 am

Barmy Fotheringay-Phipps wrote:My friend tells me that if his ex would accept him back he would happily return even if she were to say that she would no longer have sex with him. All because he wants to spend more time with his daughter.

He has met single mothers on matrimonial sites who he says fleeced him. One girl in Bombay asked him for money to pay for her child's medical expenses and he obliged even though he had never met her in person. Because he thought by helping this woman's child he is in some way compensating for the fact that he is unable to do more for his own daughter. A similar experience happened with someone in Seattle. Both times the girls stopped talking to him after taking his money.

Even though he continues to pine for his former wife, my friend is currently in communication with multiple girls. He seeks my advise and opinion about them and shows me their photographs. Many of them are single mothers. He explained that most girls who do not have children do not wish to marry him because he already has a daughter. I advised him to avoid marrying any girl with children unless the girl was someone special.

His heart seems to tell him to marry this girl in Bombay who is a single mother and who i found to be average looking but who he thinks is very beautiful. His mind is telling him to marry a rich Tamil heiress with whom he is also in communication with.

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