Nosy people

by gone Tue Apr 16, 2013 2:10 pm

Went to Main Street, literally, to buy a dozen cardboard boxes for packing/shipping. The nosy lady at the post office asks me why I need so many boxes. I said to ship some things. She smiles and asks what I plan on shipping and where. So, I say, I'm not sure what and where. She gives me a strange look and then sells the boxes and tape to me.

I have a feeling the entire town knows I bought a dozen large boxes by now.

I'm going to have to drive two hours away to a post office in a city just to avoid questions and gossip.

by Guest Tue Apr 16, 2013 2:15 pm

mainstreet wrote:Went to Main Street, literally, to buy a dozen cardboard boxes for packing/shipping. The nosy lady at the post office asks me why I need so many boxes. I said to ship some things. She smiles and asks what I plan on shipping and where. So, I say, I'm not sure what and where. She gives me a strange look and then sells the boxes and tape to me.

I have a feeling the entire town knows I bought a dozen large boxes by now.

I'm going to have to drive two hours away to a post office in a city just to avoid questions and gossip.

Your home town sounds a lot like my village back home. Ah, the comfort of knowing everyone knows you, and cares about you. *nostalgia*

by Idéfix Tue Apr 16, 2013 2:16 pm

The police will soon come around to ask you some questions.

by gone Tue Apr 16, 2013 2:18 pm

They care because they have nothing better to do. Like I said Nothing To Do and Nowhere To Go.

by FluteHolder Tue Apr 16, 2013 2:23 pm

Idéfix wrote:The police will soon come around to ask you some questions.

That is what I thought based on recent news and if she is looking more brownish, a certain possibility.

by seven Tue Apr 16, 2013 2:24 pm

make our coffeehouse your journal. keep us posted on your moving expedition.

On an unrelated note, have you been watching sweet home alabama and/or my cousin vinny type movies lately?

by gone Tue Apr 16, 2013 2:37 pm

Considering that everyone here knows my husband, it'll be fine. No cops are going to show up asking questions about why I bought a dozen boxes. There is also a desi cop in this town, so no worries.

by southindian Tue Apr 16, 2013 2:55 pm

mainstreet wrote:Considering that everyone here knows my husband, it'll be fine. No cops are going to show up asking questions about why I bought a dozen boxes. There is also a desi cop in this town, so no worries.

Aaha! Benefits of desi connection..eh

by Hellsangel Tue Apr 16, 2013 2:56 pm

The Policeman always rings twice.

by gone Tue Apr 16, 2013 3:05 pm

He's a good guy. Born and raised in this town (his parents own motels and moved here in the 1970s), and he served in Afghanistan and Iraq with some of the other military folks in this town.

by pravalika nanda Tue Apr 16, 2013 8:57 pm

mainstreet wrote:Went to Main Street, literally, to buy a dozen cardboard boxes for packing/shipping. The nosy lady at the post office asks me why I need so many boxes. I said to ship some things. She smiles and asks what I plan on shipping and where. So, I say, I'm not sure what and where. She gives me a strange look and then sells the boxes and tape to me.

I have a feeling the entire town knows I bought a dozen large boxes by now.

I'm going to have to drive two hours away to a post office in a city just to avoid questions and gossip.

** it is kind of creepy to buy a dozen large boxes at one time.

by Marathadi-Saamiyaar Tue Apr 16, 2013 9:18 pm

mainstreet wrote:He's a good guy. Born and raised in this town (his parents own motels and moved here in the 1970s), and he served in Afghanistan and Iraq with some of the other military folks in this town.

Now, we are talking...

Converting a problem into a benefit..... What an ideal situation.... Many women would love to be in your town in your situation.

by Merlot Daruwala Wed Apr 17, 2013 1:05 am

mainstreet wrote:He's a good guy. Born and raised in this town (his parents own motels and moved here in the 1970s), and he served in Afghanistan and Iraq with some of the other military folks in this town.

Ooh nice. With a studly cop entering the picture, we have a nice triangle coming up.

Of course, the plot itself is somewhat cliched, with a zillion bodice-rippers set in the Raj era, featuring bored memsaabs in remote locations. But this setting is so novel. Mississippi Masala meets Mills & Boon. Can't wait for the rest of the story (as it comes in dribs and drabs).

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:02 am

What triangle? There is a desi war veteran cop in this town with a wife from India and three kids. He has a whole bunch of Indian relatives. I know his wife, his, mom, dad, and brother. His brother is the pharmacist and talks to DH on the phone regularly. He has cousins and all kinds of FOB family members in town running their many businesses. There is no triangle here.

by Guest Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:03 am

One doesn't need a desi in town for a triangle anyway.

by garam_kuta Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:07 am

Vidya Bagchi wrote:One doesn't need a desi in town for a triangle anyway.

TMI ?

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:09 am

Trust me, the only women who would love to be here in this house in the middle of nowhere are those who have not experienced anything better, have not lived in some really nice places, have never had any real career, and are content talking on the phone instead of having a real network of friends. Such women are typically losers.

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:22 am

Although I know of many triangles in this town. The best source of information is Topix. The first thing I do in the morning is check the Topix forums for the latest gossip. Also I have discovered that 90% of the blacks and more than half the whites keep having multiple babies to get checks from the government. Yes, I'm talking women who have multiple kids from puberty to menopause, so they can get free housing, food stamps, free healthcare. Most of them aren't married, and many of them have kids with multiple men. They brag about how they keep on having kids, so they don't have to work. I mean look at Honey BooBoo's mom. She has had multiple kids with multiple men to avoid working all her life and Honey Boo Boo's father is incarcerated. These dozens of welfare kids have no role models except lazy mom who keeps having babies to get a check, and they go on to do the same thing. It's a vicious cycle. The men who aren't in prison for selling drugs are faking a disability to collect a check. Most of them are young and healthy, but no one can dispute a so-called back problem or mental illness. Clinton did not put an end to welfare because there is nothing temporary about the TANF.

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:24 am

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/09/20/us/small-town-gossip-moves-to-the-web-anonymous-and-vicious.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0

by Maria S Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:35 am

mainstreet wrote:Went to Main Street, literally, to buy a dozen cardboard boxes for packing/shipping. The nosy lady at the post office asks me why I need so many boxes. I said to ship some things. She smiles and asks what I plan on shipping and where. So, I say, I'm not sure what and where. She gives me a strange look and then sells the boxes and tape to me.

I have a feeling the entire town knows I bought a dozen large boxes by now.

I'm going to have to drive two hours away to a post office in a city just to avoid questions and gossip.

Let me see.. Same situation..in my small town scenario..

I go to the little post office- all women-run post office (two black, one white)..as always decorated so artfully and beautifully on holidays- appropriately..it's spring..so fresh flowers in vases..everywhere..bright ambience- homely:)

They see me..and they can almost read my mind.."a book of stamps or ten today Maria?" ""Mail to India?"..followed always by "how is your Mom, family?" If they don't see me..will be nosy and ask "where have you been? missed you"...or I may beat them to it.."how are you? How is your family? Is your daughter graduating?".."I missed you"..etc, etc. If I buy all these boxes, most certainly there will be some questions in a nice way.."moving? want some help?" etc, or even take the liberty and joke about it..If it's not busy..we will have a conversation about something for a few mins.

*Having said that..a min after I leave - if they gossip, it may be for a min or two..and they are back to their work and lives and not thinking about Maria, yes, in small towns too. And I move on too, on to something else.

People don't think about us as much we think they do..

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:42 am

http://www.nationalenquirer.com/celebrity/revealed-inside-honey-boo-boos-white-trash-clan

Yes, this is most of rural as well as inner-city America. By the time one educated tax-paying couple has one kid, one of these welfare moms has had many, many grandchildren. Some of these women are becoming grandmothers at 26 or 27. I cannot believe the things I have seen in this place.

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:44 am

Hi Maria S, Yes they have the remaining 10,000 residents to gossip about too, so I'll agree. However, they want to be the first to break the big news. Shipping a dozen boxes full of personal belongings to suburbs of a major city....probably leaving with no plans to return.

by southindian Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:48 am

mainstreet wrote:Went to Main Street, literally, to buy a dozen cardboard boxes for packing/shipping. The nosy lady at the post office asks me why I need so many boxes. I said to ship some things. She smiles and asks what I plan on shipping and where. So, I say, I'm not sure what and where. She gives me a strange look and then sells the boxes and tape to me.

I have a feeling the entire town knows I bought a dozen large boxes by now.

I'm going to have to drive two hours away to a post office in a city just to avoid questions and gossip.

Happens more in big towns with more people. I simply smile back to the person, say thanks and move on.

These small-town people, I tell you. They have to be taught everything.

by Marathadi-Saamiyaar Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:48 am

"In Hyden, Ky. (population 365), the local forum had 107 visitors at the same time one afternoon this month."

That is great... and we thought only in India your neighbors gossiped about you.

I need to move to a town like this. I have a consulting business idea that is likely to be hugely successful.

by southindian Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:50 am

mainstreet wrote:http://www.nationalenquirer.com/celebrity/revealed-inside-honey-boo-boos-white-trash-clan

Yes, this is most of rural as well as inner-city America. By the time one educated tax-paying couple has one kid, one of these welfare moms has had many, many grandchildren. Some of these women are becoming grandmothers at 26 or 27. I cannot believe the things I have seen in this place.

Ahem! Grandmothers at 26, 27? Could you add a minimum of +4 or +5 to age.... Please?

by Bittu Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:58 am

OP, when's the last time you were banged "good and proper"?

Been ages, I bet. Therein lies your problem.

xoxo, B

by Maria S Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:58 am

mainstreet wrote:

Yes, this is most of rural as well as inner-city America. By the time one educated tax-paying couple has one kid, one of these welfare moms has had many, many grandchildren. Some of these women are becoming grandmothers at 26 or 27. I cannot believe the things I have seen in this place.

I have lived long enough in small towns (many poor and rural) in the US..some predominantly white, some predominantly black..to know what I see- don't need any data or articles, even from the NIH or Harvard:) I don't own guns..walk around when I can..so far, so good.

I can believe it..and won't generalize I have also seen the most amazing people..women who have raised children by 30, gone on to professional schools, got their Ph.Ds..home schooled children who have gone to the Ivy leagues.Is there poverty/problems? Sure..are there disparities on every level? But, every person has a story..no need to feel sorry for all of them! They have family

*It is not for everyone (*I don't recommend it for everyone)..may be I am okay with it- based my needs and expectations! I ca always shop, travel anywhere I want to, go to the best spas, shows..from my small town..I can drive an hour to an airport and fly to anywhere..even India, if I want to..and return in a week!

There are Indians everywhere..not a problem at all...anyways, is it really that different when it comes to people/ friends anywhere? Even in India..relatives are friends are "busy" all the time..with their own lives..even more now looking at their smart phones on Facebook:)

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:59 am

It is what it is. I couldn't make up the age of these 26-year-old grandmothers if I tried.

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 11:06 am

I wouldn't live in this town for all the mind-blowing sex in the world. I'm not a man whose body makes 10 million sperm in a day that need an outlet. Women only ovulate once a month, and most people need more mentally stimulating things to do than retarded sardarji.

by Maria S Wed Apr 17, 2013 11:08 am

mainstreet wrote:It is what it is. I couldn't make up the age of these 26-year-old grandmothers if I tried.

Sure, but, how is it different from someone in India or other countries who are grandmas at an early age..or knowing professional women who are mothers for the first time when they are 40 +? It does not affect me personally. If they make good money- good for them. If they are struggling..it is what it is...they don't need pity from anyone, imo!

As I said..many of these American women are working mothers..in their communities..and many of them are taking on-line courses..(I certainly encourage them)..I met a lady who went back to taking evening college courses after 50..she will be a Registered Nurse soon..can never predict..what people can do..even if women are not working..they are raising children..taking care of older relatives..etc..their lives are productive in their own way.

by Maria S Wed Apr 17, 2013 11:10 am

Hello Mainstreet! (Have we met on line before?)

by Bittu Wed Apr 17, 2013 11:14 am

1. lives in obscure town out in the sticks.
2. has lost her sex drive. gets in heat only once a month.

meanwhile Maria wrote something with a lot of needless punctuation, bold text, slashes and pancho parenthesis.

I can't take this shyt any more. UP TO FUCKING HERE with this shyt.

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 11:15 am

Some of them may be working mothers but the vast majority are just mooching off taxpayer money. If there was no welfare, these women would have no incentive to keep having babies after their grandchildren come along. In any case, I think most rational people would agree that a grandmother in her mid to late twenties is not a good role model.

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 11:18 am

Seriously? You're so emotional because someone on an online forum is stuck in a Podunk town because of her husband's career, is nothing like the Energizer Bunny, and someone else having a conversation with her bolds some of the text in her message??? Need a Midol today?

by Marathadi-Saamiyaar Wed Apr 17, 2013 11:37 am

mainstreet wrote:I wouldn't live in this town for all the mind-blowing sex in the world. I'm not a man whose body makes 10 million sperm in a day that need an outlet. Women only ovulate once a month, and most people need more mentally stimulating things to do than retarded sardarji.

But, you are.. and have been... ?

by Maria S Wed Apr 17, 2013 11:40 am

mainstreet wrote:Some of them may be working mothers but the vast majority are just mooching off taxpayer money. If there was no welfare, these women would have no incentive to keep having babies after their grandchildren come along. In any case, I think most rational people would agree that a grandmother in her mid to late twenties is not a good role model.

Well, no one is saying it's an "ideal life"..there are certainly advantages and disadvantages, when it comes to living in small towns or large cities. I have met young grandmas (30s)..but, not many in their 20s..and they are not role models. As for taxes, think there are plenty of people- in the super rich class, upper class and middle class using/exploit the system.I pay taxes to fund public education in a few counties..and many of the children come from middle and upper classes..you can call it socialism..I don't mind..all of us helping people in need- esp. healthcare, education and food stamps.

*To me, it is about making the best of life situations..as we say "try to bloom where you are planted"..and *of course move to big cities..if that's what one longs for and can convince the husband..Of course, there is the option of "long-distance marriages" too..but, it would not have worked for me. I like to fight with mine "in person" all the time (!)..and wherever he is, it's home- he makes it my home..feel safe and happy with all the good and bad..ups and downs. *Yes, am a thankful creature:)

Amazing, how nowadays..I sound like my grandmother (am not one yet!) when she spoke about my grandfather, what to do..age and time perhaps mellows us and makes us love them more -even if we are fiercely independent free spirits!

Good luck MS! Life is short to be miserable..will not impose how I feel about small towns on you. Hope you make the best choices for you.

by Guest Wed Apr 17, 2013 11:51 am

Didn't realize stark parallels with M's small town life earlier.

by Maria S Wed Apr 17, 2013 11:57 am

Vidya Bagchi wrote:Didn't realize stark parallels with M's small town life earlier.

I don't see "stark" parallels, just parallels- in terms of size of towns, perhaps. Not all small towns are the same!
There may be some things in common..but, some things are dramatically different too.

I have also lived in small towns for a long time..so can't compare myself with Mainstreet.. the "small town" life in the US..has dramatically changed in some ways in the past 20 years-with globalization and technology. I have so many more relatives and friends from India who have moved here..

Interestingly, India- has dramatically changed in the last 10-15 years. So, not much to yearn..comparing life there as "how life in India used to be"..

*Of course..who we are as people..affects everything we see and experience too!

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 12:19 pm

I don't have a problem with safety nets for people who genuinely need the help. I have a problem with the rampant fraud when it comes to safety nets. People are milking the system by pretending to have a bad back or a mental illness. They should be made to show up somewhere for eight hours a day to do some kind of work that is possible in spite of their disability.

Likewise, I have a real problem with women viewing their kids as a paycheck. They shouldn't be breeding indiscriminately to get money. Their kids end up doing exactly the same thing. In a couple of generations, we'll be a nation of lazy people with zero motivation, for the vast majority. People can have as many kids as they like but only if they have the means to support them.

It's the same problem with the Hispanics. Their religion forbids them to use birth control and the illegals have at least five kids. Now Obama is talking about making them legal. Can you imagine all of them getting free housing, food stamps, free healthcare, and quitting their jobs to watch TV? We're already in deep debt.

by Maria S Wed Apr 17, 2013 12:31 pm

mainstreet wrote:I don't have a problem with safety nets for people who genuinely need the help. I have a problem with the rampant fraud when it comes to safety nets. People are milking the system by pretending to have a bad back or a mental illness. They should be made to show up somewhere for eight hours a day to do some kind of work that is possible in spite of their disability.

Likewise, I have a real problem with women viewing their kids as a paycheck. They shouldn't be breeding indiscriminately to get money. Their kids end up doing exactly the same thing. In a couple of generations, we'll be a nation of lazy people with zero motivation, for the vast majority. People can have as many kids as they like but only if they have the means to support them..

Sure, Mainstreet.

There is nothing to dispute - what you say in theory is right. Sometimes, realities are more complicated.

mainstreet wrote: It's the same problem with the Hispanics. Their religion forbids them to use birth control and the illegals have at least five kids. Now Obama is talking about making them legal. Can you imagine all of them getting free housing, food stamps, free healthcare, and quitting their jobs to watch TV? We're already in deep debt.

What you say is quite interesting..in the sense, even in small towns..there are so many Hispanic immigrants-large families..and their population is growing so fast- it's highly visible!

It's amusing to see- even in the deep South..whites and blacks trying so hard to work with them-deal with it as best as possible (with Southern hospitality- at least publicly!)..the stores carry so many mexican food products..restaurants serving Mexican food..all the restaurants -Southern, Soul, Chinese, Indian..hiring the chefs and workers who are hispanic..obviously because they pay them less than "locals"..it's more competitive to get even the minimum-wage jobs..and without public transportation..how can the locals drive to find jobs- with health insurance?

The ERs, Health Depts are overcrowded with Hispanic patients..more than poor White and Black patients..but, everyone trying to take it in stride..with translators, being coached to speak in Spanish etc!

*As an immigrant..do have mixed feelings about it..

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 12:37 pm

It's ridiculous. On one hand, DH has worked his tail off all his life, never worked less than 60 hours a week in addition to weekend and weeknight call. On the other hand, thousands of people in this town are just living off the taxes we pay and watching TV or sitting on their front porch looking at who's coming and going. What irks me most is the rampant breeding and horrible role models.

by Guest Wed Apr 17, 2013 12:39 pm

Why didn't I know about this easy breeding money before. Too late now dammit.

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 12:49 pm

The reality is that the moment these illegals are given legal status, it won't be competitive for employers to hire them. That means millions of them will immediately apply for food stamps, Section 8 housing, and free healthcare benefits. Once they get in the system, they don't come out...it becomes a vicious cycle of dependence.

Former illegals no longer with jobs will immediately result in more mass immigration from Central America. New illegals will promptly arrive to fill those openings.

by Marathadi-Saamiyaar Wed Apr 17, 2013 12:51 pm

mainstreet wrote:It's ridiculous. On one hand, DH has worked his tail off all his life, never worked less than 60 hours a week in addition to weekend and weeknight call. On the other hand, thousands of people in this town are just living off the taxes we pay and watching TV or sitting on their front porch looking at who's coming and going. What irks me most is the rampant breeding and horrible role models.

You mean....you are NOT against thousands of people in this town are just living off the taxes we pay
and watching TV or sitting on their front porch looking at who's coming
and going in NYC - the Great UN City?

by Guest Wed Apr 17, 2013 12:51 pm

Leave all that. Did DH see those dozen boxes or did you hide them? If he did see them, did he ask? What did u tell him?

Taking the liberty to be nosy here, coz I think you may not mind.

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 12:54 pm

DH doesn't notice anything. He comes home exhausted. If he does notice something, he probably dismisses it as something I'm doing and isn't likely to remember anything a few hours later.

by Guest Wed Apr 17, 2013 12:56 pm

mainstreet wrote:DH doesn't notice anything. He comes home exhausted. If he does notice something, he probably dismisses it as something I'm doing and isn't likely to remember anything a few hours later.

Does his indifference bother you, or do you enjoy the space?

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 12:59 pm

Yes, I know there are plenty of moochers in NYC too. Inner cities have the same social problems. Only the drugs are different. Crack cocaine vs methamphetamine.

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 1:00 pm

He isn't indifferent. He just focused on his priorities.

by gone Wed Apr 17, 2013 1:01 pm

He's focused on his priorities. Sorry, forgot the is.

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