Petrichor wrote:The author Karen Blixen said, ‘All sorrows can be borne if you put them into a story or tell a story about them.’ But what if a person can’t tell a story about his sorrows? What if his story tells him? Experience has taught me that our childhoods leave in us stories like this – stories we never found a way to voice, because no one helped us to find the words. When we cannot find a way of telling our story, our story tells us – we dream these stories, we develop symptoms, or we find ourselves acting in ways we don’t understand.

Grosz, Stephen (2013-05-28). The Examined Life: How We Lose and Find Ourselves (Kindle Locations 164-168). W. W. Norton & Company. Kindle Edition.

Petrichor wrote:"Nowadays, we lavish praise on our children. Praise, self-confidence and academic performance, it is commonly believed, rise and fall together. But current research suggests otherwise – over the past decade, a number of studies on self-esteem have come to the conclusion that praising a child as ‘clever’ may not help her at school. In fact, it might cause her to underperform. Often a child will react to praise by quitting – why make a new drawing if you have already made ‘the best’? Or a child may simply repeat the same work – why draw something new, or in a new way, if the old way always gets applause?"

Grosz, Stephen (2013-05-28). The Examined Life: How We Lose and Find Ourselves (Kindle Locations 257-261). W. W. Norton & Company. Kindle Edition.

Vidya Bagchi wrote:

Petrichor wrote:"Nowadays, we lavish praise on our children. Praise, self-confidence and academic performance, it is commonly believed, rise and fall together. But current research suggests otherwise – over the past decade, a number of studies on self-esteem have come to the conclusion that praising a child as ‘clever’ may not help her at school. In fact, it might cause her to underperform. Often a child will react to praise by quitting – why make a new drawing if you have already made ‘the best’? Or a child may simply repeat the same work – why draw something new, or in a new way, if the old way always gets applause?"

Grosz, Stephen (2013-05-28). The Examined Life: How We Lose and Find Ourselves (Kindle Locations 257-261). W. W. Norton & Company. Kindle Edition.

We grew up getting graded convent way. for english, etc, they never gave full marks for essays, etc., saying, 'there is always room for improvement'. guess they may have a point there.