Dilemma of American born Indian kids

For many children of immigrants, it’s not about adapting. They genuinely feel more like a Harry than they would ever feel like a Hardik. At the end of the day, though, it’s a personal choice. If you “feel white,” as Namrata “Nikki” Haley apparently does (so much so that she identified as white in a 2011 voter registration form, though she was born into an Indian Sikh family), then maybe you’re glad for the opportunity to use an alias, even if your name is a simple one.

confuzzled dude wrote:

For many children of immigrants, it’s not about adapting. They genuinely feel more like a Harry than they would ever feel like a Hardik. At the end of the day, though, it’s a personal choice. If you “feel white,” as Namrata “Nikki” Haley apparently does (so much so that she identified as white in a 2011 voter registration form, though she was born into an Indian Sikh family), then maybe you’re glad for the opportunity to use an alias, even if your name is a simple one.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2015/07/21/when-nikhil-becomes-nik-and-piyush-becomes-bobby-jindal/?hpid=z8

While immigrant Indians go down this path to smooth their transition into American culture and adjust to their new life, for second-generation Indians, born and brought up in America, dealing with one’s name is part of a larger identity crisis. They often hear the phrase “White from the inside, brown on the outside.” Their parents try hard to educate them on a culture they will never experience aside from a handful of summer vacations every few years, while they’re dealing with the everyday experience of being an American teenager.

confuzzled dude wrote:

For many children of immigrants, it’s not about adapting. They genuinely feel more like a Harry than they would ever feel like a Hardik. At the end of the day, though, it’s a personal choice. If you “feel white,” as Namrata “Nikki” Haley apparently does (so much so that she identified as white in a 2011 voter registration form, though she was born into an Indian Sikh family), then maybe you’re glad for the opportunity to use an alias, even if your name is a simple one.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2015/07/21/when-nikhil-becomes-nik-and-piyush-becomes-bobby-jindal/?hpid=z8

Kris wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

For many children of immigrants, it’s not about adapting. They genuinely feel more like a Harry than they would ever feel like a Hardik. At the end of the day, though, it’s a personal choice. If you “feel white,” as Namrata “Nikki” Haley apparently does (so much so that she identified as white in a 2011 voter registration form, though she was born into an Indian Sikh family), then maybe you’re glad for the opportunity to use an alias, even if your name is a simple one.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2015/07/21/when-nikhil-becomes-nik-and-piyush-becomes-bobby-jindal/?hpid=z8

>>>Jindal and Haley are politicians and also from a different generation when immigrants had a defensive attitude. There was also not much going back and forth to the home country. The Indian kids growing up today come from a position of confidence. I also wouldn't read too much into this name thing. Americans tend to do this all the time. It is just a matter of pragmatism. Even on that front, things are changing. My kids have very common indian names, albeit short ones and no one seems to have much trouble with them at least in their peer group.

Kris wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

For many children of immigrants, it’s not about adapting. They genuinely feel more like a Harry than they would ever feel like a Hardik. At the end of the day, though, it’s a personal choice. If you “feel white,” as Namrata “Nikki” Haley apparently does (so much so that she identified as white in a 2011 voter registration form, though she was born into an Indian Sikh family), then maybe you’re glad for the opportunity to use an alias, even if your name is a simple one.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2015/07/21/when-nikhil-becomes-nik-and-piyush-becomes-bobby-jindal/?hpid=z8

>>>Jindal and Haley are politicians and also from a different generation when immigrants had a defensive attitude. There was also not much going back and forth to the home country. The Indian kids growing up today come from a position of confidence. I also wouldn't read too much into this name thing. Americans tend to do this all the time. It is just a matter of pragmatism. Even on that front, things are changing. My kids have very common indian names, albeit short ones and no one seems to have much trouble with them at least in their peer group.

MaxEntropy_Man wrote:very northindian-in-deep-american-south centric article. i disagree with this in particular:

While immigrant Indians go down this path to smooth their transition into American culture and adjust to their new life, for second-generation Indians, born and brought up in America, dealing with one’s name is part of a larger identity crisis. They often hear the phrase “White from the inside, brown on the outside.” Their parents try hard to educate them on a culture they will never experience aside from a handful of summer vacations every few years, while they’re dealing with the everyday experience of being an American teenager.

not true of the indian-american kids in our circle.  i feel they truly get the best of both worlds and don't at all seem conflicted. the reality is very different for bi-coastal IA kids of today. i don't know of a single bobby, nikky or stacy in our kids' generation of IAs.

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

For many children of immigrants, it’s not about adapting. They genuinely feel more like a Harry than they would ever feel like a Hardik. At the end of the day, though, it’s a personal choice. If you “feel white,” as Namrata “Nikki” Haley apparently does (so much so that she identified as white in a 2011 voter registration form, though she was born into an Indian Sikh family), then maybe you’re glad for the opportunity to use an alias, even if your name is a simple one.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2015/07/21/when-nikhil-becomes-nik-and-piyush-becomes-bobby-jindal/?hpid=z8

A load of crap and a justification for bad parenting.

How can the kids think of themselves as Indians if they were not exposed to Indian culture/India by their parents?  How will they know the value behind their names if the parents never told them the name/meaning/relevance (perhaps, they did not know). If one has to change their name to make life easier for the barista, then they have do this and that differently to make it easy for the boss, co-worker, colleague, etc..

In fact, the acronym ABCD is obsolete. The ABDs - just during my period at Sulekha - have changed and know more about India, Indian culture, more sure-footed than the Western-aping Indian millenials - I find most of them know didly and shyt about India or Indian culture.

confuzzled dude wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

For many children of immigrants, it’s not about adapting. They genuinely feel more like a Harry than they would ever feel like a Hardik. At the end of the day, though, it’s a personal choice. If you “feel white,” as Namrata “Nikki” Haley apparently does (so much so that she identified as white in a 2011 voter registration form, though she was born into an Indian Sikh family), then maybe you’re glad for the opportunity to use an alias, even if your name is a simple one.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2015/07/21/when-nikhil-becomes-nik-and-piyush-becomes-bobby-jindal/?hpid=z8

A load of crap and a justification for bad parenting.

How can the kids think of themselves as Indians if they were not exposed to Indian culture/India by their parents?  How will they know the value behind their names if the parents never told them the name/meaning/relevance (perhaps, they did not know). If one has to change their name to make life easier for the barista, then they have do this and that differently to make it easy for the boss, co-worker, colleague, etc..

In fact, the acronym ABCD is obsolete. The ABDs - just during my period at Sulekha - have changed and know more about India, Indian culture, more sure-footed than the Western-aping Indian millenials - I find most of them know didly and shyt about India or Indian culture.

Bad parenting, really?!

Kinnera wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

For many children of immigrants, it’s not about adapting. They genuinely feel more like a Harry than they would ever feel like a Hardik. At the end of the day, though, it’s a personal choice. If you “feel white,” as Namrata “Nikki” Haley apparently does (so much so that she identified as white in a 2011 voter registration form, though she was born into an Indian Sikh family), then maybe you’re glad for the opportunity to use an alias, even if your name is a simple one.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2015/07/21/when-nikhil-becomes-nik-and-piyush-becomes-bobby-jindal/?hpid=z8

A load of crap and a justification for bad parenting.

How can the kids think of themselves as Indians if they were not exposed to Indian culture/India by their parents?  How will they know the value behind their names if the parents never told them the name/meaning/relevance (perhaps, they did not know). If one has to change their name to make life easier for the barista, then they have do this and that differently to make it easy for the boss, co-worker, colleague, etc..

In fact, the acronym ABCD is obsolete. The ABDs - just during my period at Sulekha - have changed and know more about India, Indian culture, more sure-footed than the Western-aping Indian millenials - I find most of them know didly and shyt about India or Indian culture.

Bad parenting, really?!

One thing is most surprising about Bobby Jindal. The story goes around that he decided and changed his name to Bobby, from Piyish when he was 4 yrs old, i.e in Preschool. Seriously? It indicates that the kiddo had a huge complex and issues since that tender age. What were the parents doing? No wonder he changed his religion too in his teens.

confuzzled dude wrote:

Kinnera wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2015/07/21/when-nikhil-becomes-nik-and-piyush-becomes-bobby-jindal/?hpid=z8

A load of crap and a justification for bad parenting.

How can the kids think of themselves as Indians if they were not exposed to Indian culture/India by their parents?  How will they know the value behind their names if the parents never told them the name/meaning/relevance (perhaps, they did not know). If one has to change their name to make life easier for the barista, then they have do this and that differently to make it easy for the boss, co-worker, colleague, etc..

In fact, the acronym ABCD is obsolete. The ABDs - just during my period at Sulekha - have changed and know more about India, Indian culture, more sure-footed than the Western-aping Indian millenials - I find most of them know didly and shyt about India or Indian culture.

Bad parenting, really?!

One thing is most surprising about Bobby Jindal. The story goes around that he decided and changed his name to Bobby, from Piyish when he was 4 yrs old, i.e in Preschool. Seriously? It indicates that the kiddo had a huge complex and issues since that tender age. What were the parents doing? No wonder he changed his religion too in his teens.

Aren't Bunty, Bobby, Bunny etc., typical NI nick names?

Kinnera wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

Kinnera wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

A load of crap and a justification for bad parenting.

How can the kids think of themselves as Indians if they were not exposed to Indian culture/India by their parents?  How will they know the value behind their names if the parents never told them the name/meaning/relevance (perhaps, they did not know). If one has to change their name to make life easier for the barista, then they have do this and that differently to make it easy for the boss, co-worker, colleague, etc..

In fact, the acronym ABCD is obsolete. The ABDs - just during my period at Sulekha - have changed and know more about India, Indian culture, more sure-footed than the Western-aping Indian millenials - I find most of them know didly and shyt about India or Indian culture.

Bad parenting, really?!

One thing is most surprising about Bobby Jindal. The story goes around that he decided and changed his name to Bobby, from Piyish when he was 4 yrs old, i.e in Preschool. Seriously? It indicates that the kiddo had a huge complex and issues since that tender age. What were the parents doing? No wonder he changed his religion too in his teens.

Aren't Bunty, Bobby, Bunny etc., typical NI nick names?

Ya, so? they are real/nick names even in India. The question is not about the names. The point is that the kiddo had complexes right from a young age. Patents should've noticed it and instilled some confidence and pride about his roots.

Kris wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

For many children of immigrants, it’s not about adapting. They genuinely feel more like a Harry than they would ever feel like a Hardik. At the end of the day, though, it’s a personal choice. If you “feel white,” as Namrata “Nikki” Haley apparently does (so much so that she identified as white in a 2011 voter registration form, though she was born into an Indian Sikh family), then maybe you’re glad for the opportunity to use an alias, even if your name is a simple one.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2015/07/21/when-nikhil-becomes-nik-and-piyush-becomes-bobby-jindal/?hpid=z8

>>>Jindal and Haley are politicians and also from a different generation when immigrants had a defensive attitude. There was also not much going back and forth to the home country. The Indian kids growing up today come from a position of confidence. I also wouldn't read too much into this name thing. Americans tend to do this all the time. It is just a matter of pragmatism. Even on that front, things are changing. My kids have very common indian names, albeit short ones and no one seems to have much trouble with them at least in their peer group.

Kinnera wrote:@Uppili

Exactly! When I told my kids that we don't eat beef, they wanted to know why. I clearly explained to them why. They were convinced and don't touch beef at all. They check the labels to look for the contents to see if it has beef in it. My older went a step further and stopped eating the meat of mammals altogether (no goat, lamb, pork either). 

I've seen many telugu brahmin, jain, and gujarati kids not touching any non-veg at all and remaining strict vegetarian even when they are on their own in colleges. I guess it's the same with muslim kids wrt pork. It's all in their upbringing.

I also explained the meaning of their first names to my sons and the lineage of their last name. They love their names and won't allow to shorten them (i actually don't care about shortening them, but they do. I call them by their short names, but they insist on using their full names outside).

pravalika nanda wrote:

Kinnera wrote:@Uppili

Exactly! When I told my kids that we don't eat beef, they wanted to know why. I clearly explained to them why. They were convinced and don't touch beef at all. They check the labels to look for the contents to see if it has beef in it. My older went a step further and stopped eating the meat of mammals altogether (no goat, lamb, pork either). 

I've seen many telugu brahmin, jain, and gujarati kids not touching any non-veg at all and remaining strict vegetarian even when they are on their own in colleges. I guess it's the same with muslim kids wrt pork. It's all in their upbringing.

I also explained the meaning of their first names to my sons and the lineage of their last name. They love their names and won't allow to shorten them (i actually don't care about shortening them, but they do. I call them by their short names, but they insist on using their full names outside).

when we started out poor and lived in a shady neighborhood, i went to a public school where for years i was just baby-sat and taught nothing. i was easy to baby-sit. the rest of my classmates were slamming doors, throwing books and desks at each other and the teacher. they were all poor minorities: african american/spanish/italian/jewish. the spanish-speaking population and the italians were frightfully bigotted and harassed me whenever they could cuz i was the only indian person. i often told them lies about my ethnicity - my mom is japanese and my dad is indian etc - and fairy tales to distract them.

so i think overt racism comes from a place of ignorance and poverty and if you're from an indian lower-class family (e.g. small business owners/DD/7/11/secretaries/nurses/taxi drivers/etc) and sending your kids to a public school, expect your  kids to be heavily subjected to it.  nowadays i interact with adults who have money and education, plus the field i'm in has a lot of indians so the surprise and racism is not so overt but i don't see indian men or women in positions of power..now that i thinko fit there is this wall in the ahllway of all the chairs of the department for the last 50 yrs, only one woman in all this time! so racism and sexism do exist.

the other thing is that i've observed a lot of my juniors - indians/asians have to make their performance speak for themselves in order to even be acknowledged in a room but a lot of the other guys know only half of what they talk about yet everyone knows and loves them. even in the east coast cities, who do you think has an easier time at work: junsuki kakizaki, vineela kirshnamurthy, or john spencer?

two years ago i was taking care of a woman and she said, "i expect to be taken care of by a christian, not you." i requested an indian christian male to take care of her. right in the heart of an exclusive part of nyc.

Kinnera wrote:@Uppili

Exactly! When I told my kids that we don't eat beef, they wanted to know why. I clearly explained to them why. They were convinced and don't touch beef at all. They check the labels to look for the contents to see if it has beef in it. My older went a step further and stopped eating the meat of mammals altogether (no goat, lamb, pork either). 

I've seen many telugu brahmin, jain, and gujarati kids not touching any non-veg at all and remaining strict vegetarian even when they are on their own in colleges. I guess it's the same with muslim kids wrt pork. It's all in their upbringing.

I also explained the meaning of their first names to my sons and the lineage of their last name. They love their names and won't allow to shorten them (i actually don't care about shortening them, but they do. I call them by their short names, but they insist on using their full names outside).

confuzzled dude wrote:
I hope you're not suggesting that shoving chaddiness down their throat is good parenting.

Kinnera wrote:@Uppili

Exactly! When I told my kids that we don't eat beef, they wanted to know why. I clearly explained to them why. They were convinced and don't touch beef at all. They check the labels to look for the contents to see if it has beef in it. My older went a step further and stopped eating the meat of mammals altogether (no goat, lamb, pork either). 

I've seen many telugu brahmin, jain, and gujarati kids not touching any non-veg at all and remaining strict vegetarian even when they are on their own in colleges. I guess it's the same with muslim kids wrt pork. It's all in their upbringing.

I also explained the meaning of their first names to my sons and the lineage of their last name. They love their names and won't allow to shorten them (i actually don't care about shortening them, but they do. I call them by their short names, but they insist on using their full names outside).

MaxEntropy_Man wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:
I hope you're not suggesting that shoving chaddiness down their throat is good parenting.

how does explaining one's cultural values qualify as "shoving chaddiness" down the kids' throats?

confuzzled dude wrote:

MaxEntropy_Man wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:
I hope you're not suggesting that shoving chaddiness down their throat is good parenting.

how does explaining one's cultural values qualify as "shoving chaddiness" down the kids' throats?

It has its downside. From my personal experience, it prevents them from assimilating & makes them feel they're not mainstream Americans. I had to repeat myself to my daughter that she is as American as anyone else.

swapna wrote:

Kinnera wrote:@Uppili

Exactly! When I told my kids that we don't eat beef, they wanted to know why. I clearly explained to them why. They were convinced and don't touch beef at all. They check the labels to look for the contents to see if it has beef in it. My older went a step further and stopped eating the meat of mammals altogether (no goat, lamb, pork either). 

I've seen many telugu brahmin, jain, and gujarati kids not touching any non-veg at all and remaining strict vegetarian even when they are on their own in colleges. I guess it's the same with muslim kids wrt pork. It's all in their upbringing.

I also explained the meaning of their first names to my sons and the lineage of their last name. They love their names and won't allow to shorten them (i actually don't care about shortening them, but they do. I call them by their short names, but they insist on using their full names outside).

if you or one of your children don't eat beef, but do eat the meat of lamb, goat, or chicken, please explain why.

confuzzled dude wrote:

MaxEntropy_Man wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:
I hope you're not suggesting that shoving chaddiness down their throat is good parenting.

how does explaining one's cultural values qualify as "shoving chaddiness" down the kids' throats?

It has its downside. From my personal experience, it prevents them from assimilating & makes them feel they're not mainstream Americans. I had to repeat myself to my daughter that she is as American as anyone else.

Kris wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

MaxEntropy_Man wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:
I hope you're not suggesting that shoving chaddiness down their throat is good parenting.

how does explaining one's cultural values qualify as "shoving chaddiness" down the kids' throats?

It has its downside. From my personal experience, it prevents them from assimilating & makes them feel they're not mainstream Americans. I had to repeat myself to my daughter that she is as American as anyone else.

>>>My personal opinion is that they should feel comfortable with themselves rather than worry about being anything specific. That comes from children seeing confident parents and being exposed to different cultures from which they are free to choose. Occasionally, there have been conversations with my kids about Indian parent stereotypes. It has now evolved to a healthy understanding that Indian parents or Chinese parents or Americans, for that matter, are not a monolith.

swapna wrote:

Kinnera wrote:@Uppili

Exactly! When I told my kids that we don't eat beef, they wanted to know why...

if you or one of your children don't eat beef, but do eat the meat of lamb, goat, or chicken, please explain why.

Kris wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

MaxEntropy_Man wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:
I hope you're not suggesting that shoving chaddiness down their throat is good parenting.

how does explaining one's cultural values qualify as "shoving chaddiness" down the kids' throats?

It has its downside. From my personal experience, it prevents them from assimilating & makes them feel they're not mainstream Americans. I had to repeat myself to my daughter that she is as American as anyone else.

>>>My personal opinion is that they should feel comfortable with themselves rather than worry about being anything specific. That comes from children seeing confident parents and being exposed to different cultures from which they are free to choose. Occasionally, there have been conversations with my kids about Indian parent stereotypes. It has now evolved to a healthy understanding that Indian parents or Chinese parents or Americans, for that matter, are not a monolith.

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

swapna wrote:

Kinnera wrote:@Uppili

Exactly! When I told my kids that we don't eat beef, they wanted to know why. I clearly explained to them why. They were convinced and don't touch beef at all. They check the labels to look for the contents to see if it has beef in it. My older went a step further and stopped eating the meat of mammals altogether (no goat, lamb, pork either). 

I've seen many telugu brahmin, jain, and gujarati kids not touching any non-veg at all and remaining strict vegetarian even when they are on their own in colleges. I guess it's the same with muslim kids wrt pork. It's all in their upbringing.

I also explained the meaning of their first names to my sons and the lineage of their last name. They love their names and won't allow to shorten them (i actually don't care about shortening them, but they do. I call them by their short names, but they insist on using their full names outside).

if you or one of your children don't eat beef, but do eat the meat of lamb, goat, or chicken, please explain why.

Let me explain on her behalf: Just like Bible prohibits Christians eating Horses, Americans and westerners prohibit eating cats and dogs, Kinny's kids dont eat Hinduism-prohibited Cows. Just like the Christians, Muslims and others, Kinny's kids are secular and hence eat everything else "secularistas- as recognized by you" eat.

swapna wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

swapna wrote:

Kinnera wrote:@Uppili

Exactly! When I told my kids that we don't eat beef, they wanted to know why. I clearly explained to them why. They were convinced and don't touch beef at all. They check the labels to look for the contents to see if it has beef in it. My older went a step further and stopped eating the meat of mammals altogether (no goat, lamb, pork either). 

I've seen many telugu brahmin, jain, and gujarati kids not touching any non-veg at all and remaining strict vegetarian even when they are on their own in colleges. I guess it's the same with muslim kids wrt pork. It's all in their upbringing.

I also explained the meaning of their first names to my sons and the lineage of their last name. They love their names and won't allow to shorten them (i actually don't care about shortening them, but they do. I call them by their short names, but they insist on using their full names outside).

if you or one of your children don't eat beef, but do eat the meat of lamb, goat, or chicken, please explain why.

Let me explain on her behalf: Just like Bible prohibits Christians eating Horses, Americans and westerners prohibit eating cats and dogs, Kinny's kids dont eat Hinduism-prohibited Cows. Just like the Christians, Muslims and others, Kinny's kids are secular and hence eat everything else "secularistas- as recognized by you" eat.

you haven't explained why kinnera and her child don't eat beef, whereas they do eat other kinds of meat. moreover, kinnera hasn't authorized you to give an explanation on her behalf. the glut administrator will send you back to kansas for this.

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

swapna wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

swapna wrote:

Kinnera wrote:@Uppili

Exactly! When I told my kids that we don't eat beef, they wanted to know why. I clearly explained to them why. They were convinced and don't touch beef at all. They check the labels to look for the contents to see if it has beef in it. My older went a step further and stopped eating the meat of mammals altogether (no goat, lamb, pork either). 

I've seen many telugu brahmin, jain, and gujarati kids not touching any non-veg at all and remaining strict vegetarian even when they are on their own in colleges. I guess it's the same with muslim kids wrt pork. It's all in their upbringing.

I also explained the meaning of their first names to my sons and the lineage of their last name. They love their names and won't allow to shorten them (i actually don't care about shortening them, but they do. I call them by their short names, but they insist on using their full names outside).

if you or one of your children don't eat beef, but do eat the meat of lamb, goat, or chicken, please explain why.

Let me explain on her behalf: Just like Bible prohibits Christians eating Horses, Americans and westerners prohibit eating cats and dogs, Kinny's kids dont eat Hinduism-prohibited Cows. Just like the Christians, Muslims and others, Kinny's kids are secular and hence eat everything else "secularistas- as recognized by you" eat.

you haven't explained why kinnera and her child don't eat beef, whereas they do eat other kinds of meat. moreover, kinnera hasn't authorized you to give an explanation on her behalf. the glut administrator will send you back to kansas for this.

There is one little thing you forgot. I have diplomatic pass on this site.

swapna wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

swapna wrote:

Kinnera wrote:@Uppili

Exactly! When I told my kids that we don't eat beef, they wanted to know why. I clearly explained to them why. They were convinced and don't touch beef at all. They check the labels to look for the contents to see if it has beef in it. My older went a step further and stopped eating the meat of mammals altogether (no goat, lamb, pork either). 

I've seen many telugu brahmin, jain, and gujarati kids not touching any non-veg at all and remaining strict vegetarian even when they are on their own in colleges. I guess it's the same with muslim kids wrt pork. It's all in their upbringing.

I also explained the meaning of their first names to my sons and the lineage of their last name. They love their names and won't allow to shorten them (i actually don't care about shortening them, but they do. I call them by their short names, but they insist on using their full names outside).

if you or one of your children don't eat beef, but do eat the meat of lamb, goat, or chicken, please explain why.

Let me explain on her behalf: Just like Bible prohibits Christians eating Horses, Americans and westerners prohibit eating cats and dogs, Kinny's kids dont eat Hinduism-prohibited Cows. Just like the Christians, Muslims and others, Kinny's kids are secular and hence eat everything else "secularistas- as recognized by you" eat.

you haven't explained why kinnera and her child don't eat beef, whereas they do eat other kinds of meat. moreover, kinnera hasn't authorized you to give an explanation on her behalf. the glut administrator will send you back to kansas for this.

confuzzled dude wrote:

MaxEntropy_Man wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:
I hope you're not suggesting that shoving chaddiness down their throat is good parenting.

how does explaining one's cultural values qualify as "shoving chaddiness" down the kids' throats?

It has its downside. From my personal experience, it prevents them from assimilating & makes them feel they're not mainstream Americans. I had to repeat myself to my daughter that she is as American as anyone else.

swapna wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

swapna wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

swapna wrote:
if you or one of your children don't eat beef, but do eat the meat of lamb, goat, or chicken, please explain why.

Let me explain on her behalf: Just like Bible prohibits Christians eating Horses, Americans and westerners prohibit eating cats and dogs, Kinny's kids dont eat Hinduism-prohibited Cows. Just like the Christians, Muslims and others, Kinny's kids are secular and hence eat everything else "secularistas- as recognized by you" eat.

you haven't explained why kinnera and her child don't eat beef, whereas they do eat other kinds of meat. moreover, kinnera hasn't authorized you to give an explanation on her behalf. the glut administrator will send you back to kansas for this.

There is one little thing you forgot. I have diplomatic pass on this site.

there's a not-so-little thing you're evading: explaining why it's alright to eat the meat of goats, lambs, and chickens, but not that of cows.

swapna wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

MaxEntropy_Man wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:
I hope you're not suggesting that shoving chaddiness down their throat is good parenting.

how does explaining one's cultural values qualify as "shoving chaddiness" down the kids' throats?

It has its downside. From my personal experience, it prevents them from assimilating & makes them feel they're not mainstream Americans. I had to repeat myself to my daughter that she is as American as anyone else.

assimilation and merging into the mainstream are formulas for mediocrity.

swapna wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

MaxEntropy_Man wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:
I hope you're not suggesting that shoving chaddiness down their throat is good parenting.

how does explaining one's cultural values qualify as "shoving chaddiness" down the kids' throats?

It has its downside. From my personal experience, it prevents them from assimilating & makes them feel they're not mainstream Americans. I had to repeat myself to my daughter that she is as American as anyone else.

assimilation and merging into the mainstream are formulas for mediocrity.

swapna wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

swapna wrote:

Kinnera wrote:@Uppili

Exactly! When I told my kids that we don't eat beef, they wanted to know why. I clearly explained to them why. They were convinced and don't touch beef at all. They check the labels to look for the contents to see if it has beef in it. My older went a step further and stopped eating the meat of mammals altogether (no goat, lamb, pork either). 

I've seen many telugu brahmin, jain, and gujarati kids not touching any non-veg at all and remaining strict vegetarian even when they are on their own in colleges. I guess it's the same with muslim kids wrt pork. It's all in their upbringing.

I also explained the meaning of their first names to my sons and the lineage of their last name. They love their names and won't allow to shorten them (i actually don't care about shortening them, but they do. I call them by their short names, but they insist on using their full names outside).

if you or one of your children don't eat beef, but do eat the meat of lamb, goat, or chicken, please explain why.

Let me explain on her behalf: Just like Bible prohibits Christians eating Horses, Americans and westerners prohibit eating cats and dogs, Kinny's kids dont eat Hinduism-prohibited Cows. Just like the Christians, Muslims and others, Kinny's kids are secular and hence eat everything else "secularistas- as recognized by you" eat.

you haven't explained why kinnera and her child don't eat beef, whereas they do eat other kinds of meat. moreover, kinnera hasn't authorized you to give an explanation on her behalf. the glut administrator will send you back to kansas for this.

Kinnera wrote:

swapna wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

swapna wrote:

Kinnera wrote:@Uppili

Exactly! When I told my kids that we don't eat beef, they wanted to know why. I clearly explained to them why. They were convinced and don't touch beef at all. They check the labels to look for the contents to see if it has beef in it. My older went a step further and stopped eating the meat of mammals altogether (no goat, lamb, pork either). 

I've seen many telugu brahmin, jain, and gujarati kids not touching any non-veg at all and remaining strict vegetarian even when they are on their own in colleges. I guess it's the same with muslim kids wrt pork. It's all in their upbringing.

I also explained the meaning of their first names to my sons and the lineage of their last name. They love their names and won't allow to shorten them (i actually don't care about shortening them, but they do. I call them by their short names, but they insist on using their full names outside).

if you or one of your children don't eat beef, but do eat the meat of lamb, goat, or chicken, please explain why.

Let me explain on her behalf: Just like Bible prohibits Christians eating Horses, Americans and westerners prohibit eating cats and dogs, Kinny's kids dont eat Hinduism-prohibited Cows. Just like the Christians, Muslims and others, Kinny's kids are secular and hence eat everything else "secularistas- as recognized by you" eat.

you haven't explained why kinnera and her child don't eat beef, whereas they do eat other kinds of meat. moreover, kinnera hasn't authorized you to give an explanation on her behalf. the glut administrator will send you back to kansas for this.

I think we discussed this a million times on Sulekha. Contemplate on why Indians revere the sun without which there won't be life on earth, the rivers which sustain them, the mountains like the Himalayas where the rivers originate from, the medicinal plants like Tulasi which they used to depend on in times of illness, the earth on which they live on, the cows which used to provide milk to the starving babies when their mothers' milk is not sufficient and the oxen which were used to till the ground and help them grow their food. The tradition of reverence continues and so we don't eat cows....

Kinnera wrote:

swapna wrote:
you haven't explained why kinnera and her child don't eat beef, whereas they do eat other kinds of meat. moreover, kinnera hasn't authorized you to give an explanation on her behalf. the glut administrator will send you back to kansas for this.

I think we discussed this a million times on Sulekha. Contemplate on why Indians revere the sun without which there won't be life on earth, the rivers which sustain them, the mountains like the Himalayas where the rivers originate from, the medicinal plants like Tulasi which they used to depend on in times of illness, the earth on which they live on, the cows which used to provide milk to the starving babies when their mothers' milk is not sufficient and the oxen which were used to till the ground and help them grow their food. The tradition of reverence continues and so we don't eat cows....

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

Kinnera wrote:

swapna wrote:
you haven't explained why kinnera and her child don't eat beef, whereas they do eat other kinds of meat. moreover, kinnera hasn't authorized you to give an explanation on her behalf. the glut administrator will send you back to kansas for this.

I think we discussed this a million times on Sulekha. Contemplate on why Indians revere the sun without which there won't be life on earth, the rivers which sustain them, the mountains like the Himalayas where the rivers originate from, the medicinal plants like Tulasi which they used to depend on in times of illness, the earth on which they live on, the cows which used to provide milk to the starving babies when their mothers' milk is not sufficient and the oxen which were used to till the ground and help them grow their food. The tradition of reverence continues and so we don't eat cows....

Most valid reason is that Cows provided the milk, curd and butter which were essential part of hindu diet - whereas Goat, lamb and Chicken were of lesser value to their diet. So they made Cows "holy"  They were so valuable they made an exception only for the "Brahmins" to consume on special occasions.

confuzzled dude wrote:

swapna wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

MaxEntropy_Man wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:
I hope you're not suggesting that shoving chaddiness down their throat is good parenting.

how does explaining one's cultural values qualify as "shoving chaddiness" down the kids' throats?

It has its downside. From my personal experience, it prevents them from assimilating & makes them feel they're not mainstream Americans. I had to repeat myself to my daughter that she is as American as anyone else.

assimilation and merging into the mainstream are formulas for mediocrity.

How so? Assimilation to me is being open-minded and tolerant of other cultures and points of view.

swapna wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

swapna wrote:

confuzzled dude wrote:

MaxEntropy_Man wrote:

how does explaining one's cultural values qualify as "shoving chaddiness" down the kids' throats?

It has its downside. From my personal experience, it prevents them from assimilating & makes them feel they're not mainstream Americans. I had to repeat myself to my daughter that she is as American as anyone else.

assimilation and merging into the mainstream are formulas for mediocrity.

How so? Assimilation to me is being open-minded and tolerant of other cultures and points of view.

assimilation is the process of erasing all that is unique and special about an individual. assimilation destroys the unique, which is worth developing, refining, and passing on, and preserves that which is widely available, merely for the security of being like everyone else.

swapna wrote:
assimilation is the process of erasing all that is unique and special about an individual. assimilation destroys the unique, which is worth developing, refining, and passing on, and preserves that which is widely available, merely for the security of being like everyone else.

Kinnera wrote:
I think we discussed this a million times on Sulekha. Contemplate on why Indians revere the sun without which there won't be life on earth, the rivers which sustain them, the mountains like the Himalayas where the rivers originate from, the medicinal plants like Tulasi which they used to depend on in times of illness, the earth on which they live on, the cows which used to provide milk to the starving babies when their mothers' milk is not sufficient and the oxen which were used to till the ground and help them grow their food. The tradition of reverence continues and so we don't eat cows....

garam_kuta wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:
Most valid reason is that Cows provided the milk, curd and butter which were essential part of hindu diet - whereas Goat, lamb and Chicken were of lesser value to their diet. So they made Cows "holy"  They were so valuable they made an exception only for the "Brahmins" to consume on special occasions.

you mean "kumbakOnNam gowNdar iyengars" rare/medium/welldone? on 31st of Sep/Nov ?? and when else?

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

garam_kuta wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:
Most valid reason is that Cows provided the milk, curd and butter which were essential part of hindu diet - whereas Goat, lamb and Chicken were of lesser value to their diet. So they made Cows "holy"  They were so valuable they made an exception only for the "Brahmins" to consume on special occasions.

you mean "kumbakOnNam gowNdar iyengars" rare/medium/welldone? on 31st of Sep/Nov ?? and when else?

Also, April/June,  31 and Feb 30-31 Annual Cow festival.

garam_kuta wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

garam_kuta wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:
Most valid reason is that Cows provided the milk, curd and butter which were essential part of hindu diet - whereas Goat, lamb and Chicken were of lesser value to their diet. So they made Cows "holy"  They were so valuable they made an exception only for the "Brahmins" to consume on special occasions.

you mean "kumbakOnNam gowNdar iyengars" rare/medium/welldone? on 31st of Sep/Nov ?? and when else?

Also, April/June,  31 and Feb 30-31 Annual Cow festival.

summa dabAikaadeenga..well done thAnae?

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

garam_kuta wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

garam_kuta wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:
Most valid reason is that Cows provided the milk, curd and butter which were essential part of hindu diet - whereas Goat, lamb and Chicken were of lesser value to their diet. So they made Cows "holy"  They were so valuable they made an exception only for the "Brahmins" to consume on special occasions.

you mean "kumbakOnNam gowNdar iyengars" rare/medium/welldone? on 31st of Sep/Nov ?? and when else?

Also, April/June,  31 and Feb 30-31 Annual Cow festival.

summa dabAikaadeenga..well done thAnae?

Used tro be medium rare...but with all the fear of bacterial contamination it is now well-done.

garam_kuta wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

garam_kuta wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

garam_kuta wrote:

you mean "kumbakOnNam gowNdar iyengars" rare/medium/welldone? on 31st of Sep/Nov ?? and when else?

Also, April/June,  31 and Feb 30-31 Annual Cow festival.

summa dabAikaadeenga..well done thAnae?

Used tro be medium rare...but with all the fear of bacterial contamination it is now well-done.

aiyaiyae..appO thenkalaiyaa

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

garam_kuta wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

garam_kuta wrote:

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

Also, April/June,  31 and Feb 30-31 Annual Cow festival.

summa dabAikaadeenga..well done thAnae?

Used tro be medium rare...but with all the fear of bacterial contamination it is now well-done.

aiyaiyae..appO thenkalaiyaa

Who you calling Thengathalaiyan ?