i must confess

by Guest Tue Oct 13, 2015 1:09 pm

I must confess that my loneliness
Is killing me now
Don't you know I still believe
That you will be here
And give me a sign
Hit me baby one more time

by TruthSeeker Tue Oct 13, 2015 8:30 pm

hopeless romantic.

no matter what, one must have hope.

come out of your imagination..or maybe not,
TS.

by Guest Wed Oct 14, 2015 8:20 am

TruthSeeker wrote:hopeless romantic.

no matter what, one must have hope.

come out of your imagination..or maybe not,
TS.

haha finally you somewhat-liked some lyrics... I like the male original version of this better, but this is the one on my playlist y'day.

Am I a hopeless romantic? Dunno. Guess I am, although I have been accused of being the 'tu nahi to aur sahi, aur nahi to aur sahi' types IRL. But I am old generation, so my mourning/grieving can last upto 10-12 months. Kids today, maybe 3 weeks, and you will start seeing them posting selfies with a new person.

by seven Wed Oct 14, 2015 11:52 am

Interesting. Let me indulge you a little here. What's usually the reason for your break ups. You break up or it comes to you as a surprise or you get the other person to break up with you?
Does your next relationship, after the 10-12 months mourning/grieving, starts with an entirely new person or the one you shared your feelings when you were mourning?
During this grieving period, do you go back n forth on the breakup?

by Guest Wed Oct 14, 2015 12:44 pm

seven wrote:Interesting. Let me indulge you a little here. What's usually the reason for your break ups. You break up or it comes to you as a surprise or you get the other person to break up with you?
Does your next relationship, after the 10-12 months mourning/grieving, starts with an entirely new person or the one you shared your feelings when you were mourning?
During this grieving period, do you go back n forth on the breakup?

Good questions. Guess I don't have a fixed pattern, and I have not been in that many relationships to form a complete theory. but this made me do some self-evaluation.

Reason for breakup : guess when expectations didn't match up. His or mine.

who breaks it : not fixed. Mostly I start it, but ultimately I get dumped. I prefer it that way.

next relationship : no fixed pattern. The next person does get to hear my past, but with time I am discovering I speak lesser and lesser about it.

Having said that, I have had only 2 serious relationships. I don't think I can be in another serious relationship, atleast not until younger is out of college. and then I will be too old to take anything seriously.

I have gone back and forth many times with both XB and XH, before finally breaking it off. My usual breakups with them would last anywhere from 2 to 10 months. I don't think I can completely cut off anyone out of my life, or for long, once I have formed certain wavelength with them, unless they do it first or do something too drastic. if they come back, I usually take them back, not on the same terms of course. And this means all friends and relatives as well.

by seven Wed Oct 14, 2015 3:19 pm

Only 2 serious relationships. Hmm. That explains the tu nahi aur sahi accusation. Everyone else falls under tu nahi category.

This vendor got back with a sizing of Large (5-15 months). We discussed how that's such a big gap for nvm. Irrelevant.
Do you take 2-10 months to grieve non-serious relationships too?

When you break up, do you take people back only when they come to you or do you make attempts to mend things too?

by Guest Wed Oct 14, 2015 4:07 pm

seven wrote:Only 2 serious relationships. Hmm. That explains the tu nahi aur sahi accusation. Everyone else falls under tu nahi category.

This vendor got back with a sizing of Large (5-15 months). We discussed how that's such a big gap for nvm. Irrelevant.
Do you take 2-10 months to grieve non-serious relationships too?

it does take me a long time to process out everything, no matter what I am grieving - incident or relationship, or what the nature of it was. That's by choice, or maybe that's how my thought process works. For me that can take months (rarely over a year), depending on the gravity of it. Some can grieve for years, some just a few weeks. Yet others have a new person the next day, but I suspect they were not that invested in the relationship to begin with.

seven wrote:
When you break up, do you take people back only when they come to you or do you make attempts to mend things too?

I have usually not shied away from mending things or getting back, and here I mean anyone - friends/relatives/colleagues/etc.. Especially when it comes to people who I had a good relationship with once. I don't try to avoid confrontations. In my experience, sometimes these relationships only get better, so definitely worth the try.

by seven Wed Oct 14, 2015 7:12 pm

Good girl.

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