Her Racist Encounter at the White House Correspondents' Dinner

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

Rishi wrote:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/seema-jilani/racism-white-house-correspondents-dinner_b_3231561.html

As I left the hotel and my husband went to the ballroom for the dinner, I realized he still had my keys. I approached the escalators that led down to the ballroom and asked the externally contracted security representatives if I could go down. They abruptly responded, "You can't go down without a ticket." I explained my situation and that I just wanted my keys from my husband in the foyer and that I wouldn't need to enter in the ballroom. They refused to let me through. For the next half hour, they watched as I frantically called my husband but was unable to reach him.

Then something remarkable happened. I watched as they let countless other women through -- all Caucasian -- without even asking to see their tickets. I asked why they were allowing them to go freely when they had just told me that I needed a ticket. Their response? "Well, now we are checking tickets." He rolled his eyes and let another woman through, this time actually checking her ticket. His smug tone, enveloped in condescension, taunted, "See? That's what a ticket looks like."

When I asked "Why did you lie to me, sir?" they threatened to have the Secret Service throw me out of the building -- me, a 4'11" young woman who weighs 100 pounds soaking wet, who was all prettied up in elegant formal dress, who was simply trying to reach her husband. The only thing on me that could possibly inflict harm were my dainty silver stilettos, and they were too busy inflicting pain on my feet at the moment. My suspicion was confirmed when I saw the men ask a blonde woman for her ticket and she replied, "I lost it." The snickering tough-guy responded, "I'd be happy to personally escort you down the escalators ma'am."

Like a malignancy, it had crept in when I least expected it -- this repugnant, infectious bigotry we have become so accustomed to. "White privilege" was on display, palpable to passersby who consoled me. I've come to expect this repulsive racism in many aspects of my life, but when I find it entrenched in these smaller encounters is when salt is sprinkled deep into the wounds. In these crystallizing moments it is clear that while I might see myself as just another all-American gal who has great affection for this country, others see me as something less than human, more now than ever before.

When I asked why the security representatives offered to personally escort white women without tickets downstairs while they watched me flounder, why they threatened to call the Secret Service on me, I was told, "We have to be extra careful with you all after the Boston bombings."

I explained that I am a physician, that my husband is a noted journalist for a major American newspaper, and that our guest was an esteemed, Oscar-nominated director. They did not believe me. Never mind that the American flag flew proudly outside of our home for years, with my father taking it inside whenever it rained to protect it from damage. Never mind that I won "Most Patriotic" almost every July 4th growing up. Never mind that I have provided health care to some of America's most underprivileged, even when they have refused to shake my hand because of my ethnicity.

I looked at him, struggling to bury my tears beneath whatever shred of dignity that remained. They finally saturated my lashes and flood onto my face. Shaking with rage, I said, "We are all human beings and I only ask that you give me the same respect you give others. All I am asking is to be treated with a dignity and humanity. What you did is wrong." They stared straight ahead, arms crossed, and refused to even look at me. Up came the cruel, xenophobic, soundproof wall that I had seen in the eyes of so many after 9/11. Their eyes, flecked with disdain and hatred, looked through me.

The next affront came quickly thereafter. "You were here last year, weren't you? You caused trouble here last year too. I know you," they claimed, accusing me of being a party-crasher. Completely confused, I explained that this was my first time here and that I had no idea what he was referencing. Clearly, he had assumed all brown people look the same and had confused me for someone else.

I wonder what their reaction would have been to a well-dressed white woman trying to reach her husband. Would she have struggled for over an hour while they watched and offered to escort others in? Would they not have extended an offer to help, bended over backwards to offer assistance, just as they did with the woman who "lost her ticket"? Would the Boston bombings even be mentioned to a white woman?

Let's stop this facade that we are a beacon of tolerance. I don't need you to "tolerate" me. I don't want you to merely put up with my presence. All I ask, all I have ever asked, is to be treated as a human being, that bigoted jingoism is not injected into every minute facet my life, that there remains at least the illusion of decency.

Despite being a native English speaker who was born in New Orleans and a physician who trained at a prestigious institution, all people see is the color of my skin. After this incident, I will no longer apologize, either for my faith or my complexion. It is not my job to convince you to distinguish me from the violent sociopaths that claim to be Muslims, whose terrorism I neither support, nor condone. It is your job. Just like when a disturbed young white man shoots up a movie theatre or a school, it is my job, as someone with a conscience, to distinguish them from others. It's not my job to plead with you to shake my hand without cringing, nor am I going to applaud you when you treat me with common decency; it's not an accomplishment. It's simply the right thing to do. Honestly, it's not that hard.

bw wrote:

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

how could a cab have helped her get into her room/apartment/house?

Rishi wrote:

bw wrote:

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

how could a cab have helped her get into her room/apartment/house?

First of all, she should have assessed the situation to begin with.

She is brown and a Muslim. And there was the Boston incident. There is a heightened sense of security and fear. And the authorities would not want to take chances by letting her in.

She asked them. They said no.

Why linger around? And why beg them?

Take the cab home and wait in the front porch for your husband to come home. Knock your neighbor's door and ask for help. Smart people hide an extra key somewhere outside the house.

If you live in an apartment, call the management and ask them open the apartment door. They may charge her some money. It is very similar to locking yourself out. You should plan for this contingency.

But it is better than getting humiliated

Idéfix wrote:

Rishi wrote:

bw wrote:

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

how could a cab have helped her get into her room/apartment/house?

First of all, she should have assessed the situation to begin with.

She is brown and a Muslim. And there was the Boston incident. There is a heightened sense of security and fear. And the authorities would not want to take chances by letting her in.

She asked them. They said no.

Why linger around? And why beg them?

Take the cab home and wait in the front porch for your husband to come home. Knock your neighbor's door and ask for help. Smart people hide an extra key somewhere outside the house.

If you live in an apartment, call the management and ask them open the apartment door. They may charge her some money. It is very similar to locking yourself out. You should plan for this contingency.

But it is better than getting humiliated

To summarize, you think she should have behaved like a wuss. Good for her that she didn't.

Idéfix wrote:

Rishi wrote:

bw wrote:

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

how could a cab have helped her get into her room/apartment/house?

First of all, she should have assessed the situation to begin with.

She is brown and a Muslim. And there was the Boston incident. There is a heightened sense of security and fear. And the authorities would not want to take chances by letting her in.

She asked them. They said no.

Why linger around? And why beg them?

Take the cab home and wait in the front porch for your husband to come home. Knock your neighbor's door and ask for help. Smart people hide an extra key somewhere outside the house.

If you live in an apartment, call the management and ask them open the apartment door. They may charge her some money. It is very similar to locking yourself out. You should plan for this contingency.

But it is better than getting humiliated

To summarize, you think she should have behaved like a wuss. Good for her that she didn't.

pravalika nanda wrote:

Idéfix wrote:

Rishi wrote:

bw wrote:

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

how could a cab have helped her get into her room/apartment/house?

First of all, she should have assessed the situation to begin with.

She is brown and a Muslim. And there was the Boston incident. There is a heightened sense of security and fear. And the authorities would not want to take chances by letting her in.

She asked them. They said no.

Why linger around? And why beg them?

Take the cab home and wait in the front porch for your husband to come home. Knock your neighbor's door and ask for help. Smart people hide an extra key somewhere outside the house.

If you live in an apartment, call the management and ask them open the apartment door. They may charge her some money. It is very similar to locking yourself out. You should plan for this contingency.

But it is better than getting humiliated

To summarize, you think she should have behaved like a wuss. Good for her that she didn't.

** the problem I have with an account like this is that it is entirely impossible to verify. firstly, she did not have a ticket and there was no reason to allow her into any part of that building. second, the way the article was written was quite pathetic and takes away from the gravity of the situation: if you want to talk about bigotry then don't talk about how you were "prettied up" in a "ballgown and silver stiletoes", how you are petite, your dad is a this and a that, your husband is a this and a that, and you too are something else from venus. it gives you a window into the writer's mind, that basically she is stupid, shallow, and does not know how to assess a situation. she for all these reasons believes that she is entitled to walk into this event to meet her husband. she wants shortcuts and to bend the rules, all these are behaviors typical of a lot of middle easterners/muslims. as a culture they believe they are entitled. well, in America we have rules and laws, and for the most part, middle-class americans are good citizens and try to abide by those rules and don't make a nuisance of themselves.
** while it is possible, it is improbable that the security people would say such insensitive things to her, but if she was lingering around and being a parasite, they might have said those things to her. i think she was exaggerating the situation: the soaking, the floundering, her dignity being torn to pieces. the reasonable and polite thing to do was text the man and ask for the keys or stay at a friend's place. i think this drama queen really plays to a certain class of liberals, such as yourself, max etc.

Propagandhi711 wrote:this woman seems to suffer from a mixture of persecution complex (they didn't let me through because I'm a brown woman) and entitlement complex (ohh I'm a doctor and my husband is very well known so I need to meet the president). the whole thing reads like someone overly sensitive going nuts over imaginary slights.

MaxEntropy_Man wrote:she is brown and a muslim and there was the boston bombing, but the bombers were white.

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

Jeremiah Mburuburu wrote:the comments on the article are interesting.

Jeremiah Mburuburu wrote:

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

she's quite whiny, and sounds a lot like our gdctzn of some years ago when he was making post after post about how badly tamilians were beaten up during the anti-hindi protests of the 60s.

goodcitizn wrote:

Jeremiah Mburuburu wrote:

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

she's quite whiny, and sounds a lot like our gdctzn of some years ago when he was making post after post about how badly tamilians were beaten up during the anti-hindi protests of the 60s.

I have always been against Hindi imposition in Tamil Nadu.Unlike you who finds a Ph D to teach your daughter Hindi and then resort to indecent comments about north indians, I am not a hypocrite. Lately you have been bitter, behaving like you are in a lot discomfort about the world around you so you might be well-advised to go with larger size attends.

Marathadi-Saamiyaar wrote:

Jeremiah Mburuburu wrote:the comments on the article are interesting.

Any spelling/grammar mistakes in Arianna's English?

Propagandhi711 wrote:

goodcitizn wrote:

Jeremiah Mburuburu wrote:

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

she's quite whiny, and sounds a lot like our gdctzn of some years ago when he was making post after post about how badly tamilians were beaten up during the anti-hindi protests of the 60s.

I have always been against Hindi imposition in Tamil Nadu.Unlike you who finds a Ph D to teach your daughter Hindi and then resort to indecent comments about north indians, I am not a hypocrite. Lately you have been bitter, behaving like you are in a lot discomfort about the world around you so you might be well-advised to go with larger size attends.

lately? try 13+ yrs. but I guess you've known him for longer so not entirely wrong, perhaps.

goodcitizn wrote:

Jeremiah Mburuburu wrote:

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

she's quite whiny, and sounds a lot like our gdctzn of some years ago when he was making post after post about how badly tamilians were beaten up during the anti-hindi protests of the 60s.

I have always been against Hindi imposition in Tamil Nadu.Unlike you who finds a Ph D to teach your daughter Hindi and then resort to indecent comments about north indians, I am not a hypocrite. Lately you have been bitter, behaving like you are in a lot discomfort about the world around you so you might be well-advised to go with larger size attends.

Jeremiah Mburuburu wrote:

goodcitizn wrote:

Jeremiah Mburuburu wrote:

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

she's quite whiny, and sounds a lot like our gdctzn of some years ago when he was making post after post about how badly tamilians were beaten up during the anti-hindi protests of the 60s.

I have always been against Hindi imposition in Tamil Nadu.Unlike you who finds a Ph D to teach your daughter Hindi and then resort to indecent comments about north indians, I am not a hypocrite. Lately you have been bitter, behaving like you are in a lot discomfort about the world around you so you might be well-advised to go with larger size attends.

you whined in the most pathetic way. no tamilian or southern indian should whine and expect sympathy as you did. you made me cringe. northindians should be given a taste of their own medicine.

Jeremiah Mburuburu wrote:

goodcitizn wrote:

Jeremiah Mburuburu wrote:

Rishi wrote:This dumb Pakistani woman should have taken a cab.

She claims to be a Physician. So what?

she's quite whiny, and sounds a lot like our gdctzn of some years ago when he was making post after post about how badly tamilians were beaten up during the anti-hindi protests of the 60s.

I have always been against Hindi imposition in Tamil Nadu.Unlike you who finds a Ph D to teach your daughter Hindi and then resort to indecent comments about north indians, I am not a hypocrite. Lately you have been bitter, behaving like you are in a lot discomfort about the world around you so you might be well-advised to go with larger size attends.

you whined in the most pathetic way. no tamilian or southern indian should whine and expect sympathy as you did. you made me cringe. northindians should be given a taste of their own medicine.

pravalika nanda wrote:the problem I have with an account like this is that it is entirely impossible to verify.

pravalika nanda wrote:firstly, she did not have a ticket and there was no reason to allow her into any part of that building. second, the way the article was written was quite pathetic and takes away from the gravity of the situation: if you want to talk about bigotry then don't talk about how you were "prettied up" in a "ballgown and silver stiletoes", how you are petite, your dad is a this and a that, your husband is a this and a that, and you too are something else from venus. it gives you a window into the writer's mind, that basically she is stupid, shallow, and does not know how to assess a situation.

pravalika nanda wrote:she wants shortcuts and to bend the rules, all these are behaviors typical of a lot of middle easterners/muslims. as a culture they believe they are entitled. well, in America we have rules and laws, and for the most part, middle-class americans are good citizens and try to abide by those rules and don't make a nuisance of themselves.

pravalika nanda wrote:

Propagandhi711 wrote:this woman seems to suffer from a mixture of persecution complex (they didn't let me through because I'm a brown woman) and entitlement complex (ohh I'm a doctor and my husband is very well known so I need to meet the president). the whole thing reads like someone overly sensitive going nuts over imaginary slights.

** baava, you're quite generous. I just chalked it up to her culture, which when you think about it is a mix of the two complexes anyway. i know it's not the pc thing to say but i can't pretend to respect them.

Idéfix wrote:

pravalika nanda wrote:

Propagandhi711 wrote:this woman seems to suffer from a mixture of persecution complex (they didn't let me through because I'm a brown woman) and entitlement complex (ohh I'm a doctor and my husband is very well known so I need to meet the president). the whole thing reads like someone overly sensitive going nuts over imaginary slights.

** baava, you're quite generous. I just chalked it up to her culture, which when you think about it is a mix of the two complexes anyway. i know it's not the pc thing to say but i can't pretend to respect them.

Yes, bigotry is not politically correct, and that's a good thing. There was a time when bigotry was politically correct, when you and I were not allowed into "whites only" restaurants and had to drink at separate water fountains from the white folk.

Idéfix wrote:

pravalika nanda wrote:the problem I have with an account like this is that it is entirely impossible to verify.

If we are going to dispute whether any of the events depicted in the article actually occurred, that is not a productive discussion because we don't have any evidence to back up such speculations. Assuming for a moment that it went down the way she described it -- that they stopped her but allowed white women to go in without checking their tickets -- she had two choices: the wussy approach or the confrontational approach. I for one don't approve of the wussy approach of ignoring discrimination or bigotry. It is possible that it didn't go down the way she described it -- that she wanted to break the rules, but was stopped, and then she made up the part about white women being allowed to go in without ticket checks, and then wrote a whole column about discrimination that didn't even exist. But I find that less plausible -- remember, this is the country where a Sikh temple was targeted for shootings because they looked like Muslims.

pravalika nanda wrote:firstly, she did not have a ticket and there was no reason to allow her into any part of that building. second, the way the article was written was quite pathetic and takes away from the gravity of the situation: if you want to talk about bigotry then don't talk about how you were "prettied up" in a "ballgown and silver stiletoes", how you are petite, your dad is a this and a that, your husband is a this and a that, and you too are something else from venus. it gives you a window into the writer's mind, that basically she is stupid, shallow, and does not know how to assess a situation.

What you wrote makes good sense as literary criticism, and I agree she could have written a better article about the incident. But the problem here is not her writing skills, it is the racial discrimination that you so casually condone or encourage, just because it targets other brown people outside your own community.
** this is someone who wanted special treatment because she is educated and well-off and well-dressed and harmlessly petite. she's probably from a well-connected family in pakistan and everyone there might bend over backwards cuz she's part of the elite there but here she's not, she's a middle-class woman with a middle-class job and she has been given an opportunity to get an excellent education and healthcare and freedom and the right to vote and dress as she pleases. one little incident and she says all this crap. what has she done for the country? nothing. the country has much less to offer even the soldiers returning from war. immigrants have to work hard and earn goodwill and earn their place in society.

** i find it interesting that you want to give so much weight to her account of events. from the way she has written, this is not someone i would take seriously, her experience has zero value for me because i do not trust her to be honest or factual. she is living in some fairy tale in her head and the white people are persecuting her. and i think culturally arabs and muslims - even their middle classes - have very little experience with equality, democracy, and civil behavior, and a civic sense, and hence think they deserve to have the rules bent for them. i don't respect that and i don't respect them. however, i would not tolerate discrimination against them.

** i don't force my way into parties if i don't have a ticket, and i wouldn't date a guy who's not reachable by cellphone, and if i wouldn't get soaked in the rain, and if someone says "no, i can't let you in" i'd get back into my apt some other way. that's the normal thing to do. if you think there was discrimination write about in a factual and succinct manner.

pravalika nanda wrote:she wants shortcuts and to bend the rules, all these are behaviors typical of a lot of middle easterners/muslims. as a culture they believe they are entitled. well, in America we have rules and laws, and for the most part, middle-class americans are good citizens and try to abide by those rules and don't make a nuisance of themselves.

This is where you make the transition from reasoned argument to outright bigotry. A white American who has no family overseas might make this kind of bigoted statement. But for you to make that statement, when you know lots of people who go about their lives in India with the same kind of entitlement and bending of the rules every single day, well, that just shows a disturbing incapacity for introspection.

Rishi wrote:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/seema-jilani/racism-white-house-correspondents-dinner_b_3231561.html

As I left the hotel and my husband went to the ballroom for the dinner, I realized he still had my keys. I approached the escalators that led down to the ballroom and asked the externally contracted security representatives if I could go down. They abruptly responded, "You can't go down without a ticket." I explained my situation and that I just wanted my keys from my husband in the foyer and that I wouldn't need to enter in the ballroom. They refused to let me through. For the next half hour, they watched as I frantically called my husband but was unable to reach him.

Then something remarkable happened. I watched as they let countless other women through -- all Caucasian -- without even asking to see their tickets. I asked why they were allowing them to go freely when they had just told me that I needed a ticket. Their response? "Well, now we are checking tickets." He rolled his eyes and let another woman through, this time actually checking her ticket. His smug tone, enveloped in condescension, taunted, "See? That's what a ticket looks like."

When I asked "Why did you lie to me, sir?" they threatened to have the Secret Service throw me out of the building -- me, a 4'11" young woman who weighs 100 pounds soaking wet, who was all prettied up in elegant formal dress, who was simply trying to reach her husband. The only thing on me that could possibly inflict harm were my dainty silver stilettos, and they were too busy inflicting pain on my feet at the moment. My suspicion was confirmed when I saw the men ask a blonde woman for her ticket and she replied, "I lost it." The snickering tough-guy responded, "I'd be happy to personally escort you down the escalators ma'am."

Like a malignancy, it had crept in when I least expected it -- this repugnant, infectious bigotry we have become so accustomed to. "White privilege" was on display, palpable to passersby who consoled me. I've come to expect this repulsive racism in many aspects of my life, but when I find it entrenched in these smaller encounters is when salt is sprinkled deep into the wounds. In these crystallizing moments it is clear that while I might see myself as just another all-American gal who has great affection for this country, others see me as something less than human, more now than ever before.

When I asked why the security representatives offered to personally escort white women without tickets downstairs while they watched me flounder, why they threatened to call the Secret Service on me, I was told, "We have to be extra careful with you all after the Boston bombings."

I explained that I am a physician, that my husband is a noted journalist for a major American newspaper, and that our guest was an esteemed, Oscar-nominated director. They did not believe me. Never mind that the American flag flew proudly outside of our home for years, with my father taking it inside whenever it rained to protect it from damage. Never mind that I won "Most Patriotic" almost every July 4th growing up. Never mind that I have provided health care to some of America's most underprivileged, even when they have refused to shake my hand because of my ethnicity.

I looked at him, struggling to bury my tears beneath whatever shred of dignity that remained. They finally saturated my lashes and flood onto my face. Shaking with rage, I said, "We are all human beings and I only ask that you give me the same respect you give others. All I am asking is to be treated with a dignity and humanity. What you did is wrong." They stared straight ahead, arms crossed, and refused to even look at me. Up came the cruel, xenophobic, soundproof wall that I had seen in the eyes of so many after 9/11. Their eyes, flecked with disdain and hatred, looked through me.

The next affront came quickly thereafter. "You were here last year, weren't you? You caused trouble here last year too. I know you," they claimed, accusing me of being a party-crasher. Completely confused, I explained that this was my first time here and that I had no idea what he was referencing. Clearly, he had assumed all brown people look the same and had confused me for someone else.

I wonder what their reaction would have been to a well-dressed white woman trying to reach her husband. Would she have struggled for over an hour while they watched and offered to escort others in? Would they not have extended an offer to help, bended over backwards to offer assistance, just as they did with the woman who "lost her ticket"? Would the Boston bombings even be mentioned to a white woman?

Let's stop this facade that we are a beacon of tolerance. I don't need you to "tolerate" me. I don't want you to merely put up with my presence. All I ask, all I have ever asked, is to be treated as a human being, that bigoted jingoism is not injected into every minute facet my life, that there remains at least the illusion of decency.

Despite being a native English speaker who was born in New Orleans and a physician who trained at a prestigious institution, all people see is the color of my skin. After this incident, I will no longer apologize, either for my faith or my complexion. It is not my job to convince you to distinguish me from the violent sociopaths that claim to be Muslims, whose terrorism I neither support, nor condone. It is your job. Just like when a disturbed young white man shoots up a movie theatre or a school, it is my job, as someone with a conscience, to distinguish them from others. It's not my job to plead with you to shake my hand without cringing, nor am I going to applaud you when you treat me with common decency; it's not an accomplishment. It's simply the right thing to do. Honestly, it's not that hard.

pravalika nanda wrote:

Idéfix wrote:

pravalika nanda wrote:the problem I have with an account like this is that it is entirely impossible to verify.

If we are going to dispute whether any of the events depicted in the article actually occurred, that is not a productive discussion because we don't have any evidence to back up such speculations. Assuming for a moment that it went down the way she described it -- that they stopped her but allowed white women to go in without checking their tickets -- she had two choices: the wussy approach or the confrontational approach. I for one don't approve of the wussy approach of ignoring discrimination or bigotry. It is possible that it didn't go down the way she described it -- that she wanted to break the rules, but was stopped, and then she made up the part about white women being allowed to go in without ticket checks, and then wrote a whole column about discrimination that didn't even exist. But I find that less plausible -- remember, this is the country where a Sikh temple was targeted for shootings because they looked like Muslims.

pravalika nanda wrote:firstly, she did not have a ticket and there was no reason to allow her into any part of that building. second, the way the article was written was quite pathetic and takes away from the gravity of the situation: if you want to talk about bigotry then don't talk about how you were "prettied up" in a "ballgown and silver stiletoes", how you are petite, your dad is a this and a that, your husband is a this and a that, and you too are something else from venus. it gives you a window into the writer's mind, that basically she is stupid, shallow, and does not know how to assess a situation.

What you wrote makes good sense as literary criticism, and I agree she could have written a better article about the incident. But the problem here is not her writing skills, it is the racial discrimination that you so casually condone or encourage, just because it targets other brown people outside your own community.
** this is someone who wanted special treatment because she is educated and well-off and well-dressed and harmlessly petite. she's probably from a well-connected family in pakistan and everyone there might bend over backwards cuz she's part of the elite there but here she's not, she's a middle-class woman with a middle-class job and she has been given an opportunity to get an excellent education and healthcare and freedom and the right to vote and dress as she pleases. one little incident and she says all this crap. what has she done for the country? nothing. the country has much less to offer even the soldiers returning from war. immigrants have to work hard and earn goodwill and earn their place in society.

** i find it interesting that you want to give so much weight to her account of events. from the way she has written, this is not someone i would take seriously, her experience has zero value for me because i do not trust her to be honest or factual. she is living in some fairy tale in her head and the white people are persecuting her. and i think culturally arabs and muslims - even their middle classes - have very little experience with equality, democracy, and civil behavior, and a civic sense, and hence think they deserve to have the rules bent for them. i don't respect that and i don't respect them. however, i would not tolerate discrimination against them.

** i don't force my way into parties if i don't have a ticket, and i wouldn't date a guy who's not reachable by cellphone, and if i wouldn't get soaked in the rain, and if someone says "no, i can't let you in" i'd get back into my apt some other way. that's the normal thing to do. if you think there was discrimination write about in a factual and succinct manner.

pravalika nanda wrote:she wants shortcuts and to bend the rules, all these are behaviors typical of a lot of middle easterners/muslims. as a culture they believe they are entitled. well, in America we have rules and laws, and for the most part, middle-class americans are good citizens and try to abide by those rules and don't make a nuisance of themselves.

This is where you make the transition from reasoned argument to outright bigotry. A white American who has no family overseas might make this kind of bigoted statement. But for you to make that statement, when you know lots of people who go about their lives in India with the same kind of entitlement and bending of the rules every single day, well, that just shows a disturbing incapacity for introspection.

** i don't know people in india who break the rules, i come from a poor family in india, i go to the village when i visit, and i eat at roadside shacks when i do cuz my extended family would feel out-of-place if i took them to better places. my dad's generation is the first to get away from their caste-based profession and to leave the country. my cousins in india are clerks and they make like 6 to 10 k rupees per month. they are not in a position to manipulate the rules, they're lucky to feed themselves. and here in America, we're middle class and we can afford the occasional trip abroad, but all the kids (we were between 2 to 8yrs of age when we came) all went to public schools and then to state universities and a couple went onto the ivy leagues you guys masturbate over. i can't speak for the people in india cuz i don't know them well, but i know the kids i grew up with are very likely to continue to be productive and successful w/o bending the rules; we don't act entitled. Indians have a lot of goodwill in this country and they'd lose it if they acted that way.

pravalika nanda wrote:
** i don't know people in india who break the rules, i come from a poor family in india, i go to the village when i visit, and i eat at roadside shacks when i do cuz my extended family would feel out-of-place if i took them to better places. my dad's generation is the first to get away from their caste-based profession and to leave the country. my cousins in india are clerks and they make like 6 to 10 k rupees per month. they are not in a position to manipulate the rules, they're lucky to feed themselves. and here in America, we're middle class and we can afford the occasional trip abroad, but all the kids (we were between 2 to 8yrs of age when we came) all went to public schools and then to state universities and a couple went onto the ivy leagues you guys masturbate over. i can't speak for the people in india cuz i don't know them well, but i know the kids i grew up with are very likely to continue to be productive and successful w/o bending the rules; we don't act entitled. Indians have a lot of goodwill in this country and they'd lose it if they acted that way.

Idéfix wrote:

pravalika nanda wrote:she wants shortcuts and to bend the rules, all these are behaviors typical of a lot of middle easterners/muslims. as a culture they believe they are entitled. well, in America we have rules and laws, and for the most part, middle-class americans are good citizens and try to abide by those rules and don't make a nuisance of themselves.

This is where you make the transition from reasoned argument to outright bigotry. A white American who has no family overseas might make this kind of bigoted statement. But for you to make that statement, when you know lots of people who go about their lives in India with the same kind of entitlement and bending of the rules every single day, well, that just shows a disturbing incapacity for introspection.