ND Tiwari gets ready........

indophile wrote:Gandharva wedding is when both man and woman are anxious and can't wait for the purohit (pandit) to do his thing. No time to lit a fire to walk around, and they consider their internal fire is sacred enough, and the five elements make excellent witnesses. This type of marriage is allowed only between two kshatriyas. But Tiwari is no kshatriya.

Pisachika wedding happens when a woman kidnaps the guy and pleads/forces him to marry her - a la Arjuna-Ulupi, Aniruddha-Usha. No woman in her right mind would have found N.D. Tiwari that desirable to take the trouble to kidnap him for marriage. Also, this form of wedding too is reserved only for kshatryas, and so Tiwari is disqualified.

indophile wrote:http://www.telugubandhu.com/2013/06/blog-post_9025.html

No confusion there, just misinformation.

"Rakshasam" is when boy and girl like each other, peddalu angeekarincharu, they elope, if peddalu get in the way the boy fights and defeats them (with some help from our demure girl) and that's end of story.

"Asuram" is when the father disregards his daughter's wishes completely, and marries her off for some money from the boy (the type of marriage that Arabs engage in with Hyderabadi muslim girls).

Paisachikam is where our teacher said something (the girl kidnaps the boy), but the websites say something else (the boy forces himself on the girl after giving her laced orange juice or something).

Also, we were told by our teacher that only Kshatriyas are allowed to "marry" all 8 ways, Brahmins - the first 4 ways, and everyone else just one way, the first way. And the mattelu (toe rings), no one except Kshatriyas are allowed to wear gold below the waist; non-kshatriyas can only wear silver below the waist.

Vakavaka Pakapaka wrote:

indophile wrote:http://www.telugubandhu.com/2013/06/blog-post_9025.html

No confusion there, just misinformation.

"Rakshasam" is when boy and girl like each other, peddalu angeekarincharu, they elope, if peddalu get in the way the boy fights and defeats them (with some help from our demure girl) and that's end of story.

"Asuram" is when the father disregards his daughter's wishes completely, and marries her off for some money from the boy (the type of marriage that Arabs engage in with Hyderabadi muslim girls).

Paisachikam is where our teacher said something (the girl kidnaps the boy), but the websites say something else (the boy forces himself on the girl after giving her laced orange juice or something).

Also, we were told by our teacher that only Kshatriyas are allowed to "marry" all 8 ways, Brahmins - the first 4 ways, and everyone else just one way, the first way. And the mattelu (toe rings), no one except Kshatriyas are allowed to wear gold below the waist; non-kshatriyas can only wear silver below the waist.

Actually, Rakshasa and Paisachika are not considered proper for anyone. The rest of the 6 were practiced in different scenarios. Prajapatyam is supposed to be the ideal and is hence commonly practiced. Asuram got that name because it is purely materialistic and the father is supposed not to get the type of "phalam" that kanyaadaanam is supposed to yield.

In my village, I am aware of two marriages in which the men, when their first wives passed away, "bought" their second wives (from very poor families). In both cases, the women became widows a few years after their marriage. The first one had only one kid, a son. He became an engineer and prospered. His mother used to live alone in the village when I was a kid. She used to read the news papers and books and tell the kids what is happening in the world. She used to follow the "Nanavati murder case" (1950's). In the night, us kids used to sleep in her house (we used to take turns) since she was scared of thieves, bhootams, etc. Her cot used to be in the middle and ours, around hers (quite selfish on her part).  She used to be a very good story teller; so, we enjoyed her company. One night, she stepped on a soft thing in the dark and thought it was a snake. She let out a loud fart and fainted. LOL.

The other woman had a son and a daughter. The son passed IAS and became a big shot in the govt. The daughter did a Ph.D. in chemistry. She is settled in the US. The mother was a quiet, reserved person who devoted her life to her kids.